To The Player Who X'd

[MonkeyPants4736]

My char wrote a poem for one of yours. Since you won't see it in-game, I can PM it to you if you would like to see it.

[hyrle]

I'm sorry to see you go - player who X'd. We had many memorable characters together, including an interesting couple that I wish I had put more effort into. But it was still fun playing with you.

[*Wiro]

I'll miss you, Britney.

[Marian]

And now there's another one.

RL and your own health always has to come first of course, but both of you will be greatly missed IC and here on the forums, and we all hope to see you back again someday when you're able.

[*Wiro]

I'll miss you, Skullsmasher.

[Moonflame]

It's almost been 4 days since my characters died, so I'm almost ready to shower the forums with praise. I'm really passionate about Cantr. Monkey's poem was really .. sweet, for a moment it had me guilt-tripping-over my trousers. And Wiro should know that 90's songs with the dancing and a key change near the end are probably one of the many ways to my heart.

I'd like to say I'll come back in a year or so, but I don't know. When I became involved in Cantr as much as I wanted to be, I wasn't really happy. If I were to properly play again I'd have to either:
- Play totally immersed and disconnect completely from the forums and players. Only have 2 characters. Not be as active.
- Play very lightheartedly, this isn't really my style but it's the only way I'd be happy with the possibility of people knowing my characters. These characters would never be gamechangers and I wouldn't be anywhere near as active.
- Join PD. Scary, huh.

We all post most in the 'things that annoy or puzzle' thread. This is bad. If there's enough love in the next week I'll sing to you.

RL and your own health always has to come first of course

You make it sound like you only want us healthy enough to play decently, and other than that we can be little Cantr machines :P

[Marian]

You make it sound like you only want us healthy enough to play decently, and other than that we can be little Cantr machines

Well yeah.

To be fair, wanting to play and not having time to play, or being tired or frustrated with IC situations and needing to step away are both things that can be resolved that way, it's just that your situation sounds a little more complicated.

When/if you're ready to come back some day, I'd argue that even 'lighthearted' play can change the Cantr world too, though if option 1 is the only thing you're comfortable with, I do understand even if we'd miss you around the forums, and it really is a more immersive way to play. People do tend to make their characters a little too obvious here, sometimes not even intentionally, and once you know one it's not long before you know them all...I enjoyed the game more as well before I realized just how incestuous the EZ was, I admit, and it can get draining running into the same people playing what are essentially the exact same characters again and again and again.

Though you did seem to manage a kind of middle ground there at least for a time; like I said, I had no idea and wouldn't have guessed in a million years you played those characters you've mentioned to me, and I'm still a bit in awe. You're a fantastic RPer with some amazing characters you kept with their own unique and separate personalities and worldview, and that's rare enough lately that I know it must be incredibly difficult. Which is why I'm being completely selfish here and wanting you to come back and be a little Cantr machine, because the game world is that much more immersive and interesting with yours in it. Even with just the two mine knew, you made a major impact.

[playerslayer666]

Eeepp hasn't stopped crying over Clara's death......

And Jennifer of Seatown Forest died as well. Now I need to try harder on Shawn before things get worse in that town, but I hate putting actual work into this game. Uhg......

But it seems like every time someone important dies it only inspires people to get off their ass and do more with their life. Shame someone has to die for people to realize they aren't giving certain characters enough attention.

[Moonflame]

Though you did seem to manage a kind of middle ground there at least for a time; like I said, I had no idea and wouldn't have guessed in a million years you played those characters you've mentioned to me...

Yeah, I had far too much fun hiding them! There were all of these influential players on the forums with awesome characters, seeing half-anonymous praise of my characters had me practically sat giggling behind my screen like a kid who got something right. In fact, I can just about accept praise from you now without regressing into character. Thanks

The characters getting outed is one thing, but that's not my main problem. At first when you start watching the forums, you're like, right:
- Don't use the emote *smiles softly*
- Looks like one of my leaders is generic, let's slowly express her personality more
- More sex happens than I thought, I'll be aware of that
- Ohh, oh looks like the new scary guy...girl? Woteva.. is that pirate on the radio
- Did someone say lemon drops are being implemented? I'm all over that.

Most of that's useful to know, but any further and your gameplay starts to change because of opinions that circulate. If someone influential moans about something, everyone who hasn't experienced that something (including me) will start to consider that viewpoint because it's all they have been exposed to. And sometimes others have information that would counter that, but they're not going to say it, out their character and likely get an argumentative response. Only this small group feel comfortable with really putting their opinions about ingame events or places on the forums, and to be honest, it dominates the EZ. I was quiet to avoid people forming expectations about my characters/towns, I avoided EZ radio for the same reason. The forums kind of push people into playing a certain way, I think. Are you aware of how influential you are, active posters?

The forums were probably a source of minor stress for me, and I imagine it's similar for lots of players. I think it resulted in me feeling left out sometimes, frustrated and impatient. I wanted to get my characters to rush off and find faster paced RP because of what I read on here, but honestly slower RP (when it's good) is so bloody good, and it's sustainable because you have plenty of time for real life. The playerbase are exposed to something that isn't, or shouldn't be fully representative of the EZ.

[Alutka]

At first when you start watching the forums, you're like, right:
- Don't use the emote *smiles softly*
- Looks like one of my leaders is generic, let's slowly express her personality more

Yeah, but on the other hand you start to worry, that maybe by expressing personality you will end up being classified as a 'special snowflake'.

Only this small group feel comfortable with really putting their opinions about ingame events or places on the forums, and to be honest, it dominates the EZ. I was quiet to avoid people forming expectations about my characters/towns, I avoided EZ radio for the same reason. The forums kind of push people into playing a certain way, I think. Are you aware of how influential you are, active posters?

The forums were probably a source of minor stress for me, and I imagine it's similar for lots of players. I think it resulted in me feeling left out sometimes, frustrated and impatient. I wanted to get my characters to rush off and find faster paced RP because of what I read on here, but honestly slower RP (when it's good) is so bloody good, and it's sustainable because you have plenty of time for real life.

Seconded. So bloody seconded.

Though I am in a good situation, as I do not really play much in the EZ, and also no one knows my English chars.

Edited: Also, I was such a crappy RPer at the very beginning. If I had read the forum back then, I would have probably resigned from playing. Luckily I've met a player who was patient enough not to be bothered by all the shit I did, and allowed me to develop.

[Marian]

Yeah, but on the other hand you start to worry, that maybe by expressing personality you will end up being classified as a 'special snowflake'.

I don't think it's personality that qualifies characters for snowflake status, it's more of a chronic condition.

But Moonie, I understand completely, and you're not the only one that finds the forums more of a frustration than anything else, sometimes. It's natural to want to discuss a game we're all this much into, but there's been a lot of situations where I would have been much, much happier not knowing certain things, or seeing these situations where people let one character's feelings bleed waaaaay over into their how their others act and how they themselves act OOC. (the inability to compartmentalize is much more common than I previously believed, which is just depressing in a game which such a small playerbase that you're constantly running into the same people)

And once you learn these things and start picking up on certain patterns and just how common they all are it's impossible to unlearn it all, and while I still enjoy the game, it feels like a lot of the magic is gone now.

I can still get into my character's heads just fine, but it's like there's always this running commentary in the background going, 'Oh look, this one belongs to that player and and hey surprise surprise they have the same personality and speech patterns and inclinations to creepiness/violence/attention whoring/whatever as all the others of theirs I've met.' or 'Oh look, character A was just incredibly reasonable and friendly with character B, but character B is also character C who hates A so I know exactly how this is going to go' 'Wow does [PLAYER] really have to keep up a running commentary on how distressed [EVENT] makes them on all their chars when only one is being effected?' 'Oh look [EVENT] got posted about on the forum and now multiple chars of [PLAYER] are popping up with weirdly suspicious questions about it' 'hmm why DOES this character have such strong, definite opinions about something they only heard about once on the radio when they're usually going on about how the radio can't be trusted, oh is it because they play that character? who saw that coming certainly not me '



So yes, I can definitely see lots of reasons for staying clear of the forums. Besides the other issues there, they make us all cynical and bitter.

[ObsessedWithCats]

I think I'm going to set a rule for myself, that I can only go on the forums on days when all of my characters have already woken. I think I've managed reasonably well, but there sure is enough negativity here that it'll do me good to prioritise the game itself.

I think I'm a bit dense about connecting dots though - half of these problems I never cotton on to enough to be troubled by XD

Turns out I knew a couple of your characters Moonflame. I hope you can find a way to come back and have fun in the green world when you're ready ^_^

[Moonflame]

Thanks Cats. I wouldn't worry about thinking you're dense, most people don't catch on to the majority of this stuff, but Marian's in the thick of it.

I don't like when the people who are trying are feeling cynical and bitter, and if you get frustrated Marian, then everyone does, because you're probably the most active poster on the forums, you speak (type) with authority. You're a role model and driving force for the forums as they are. I bet you think you're just responding to the people around you, (because you said that once about your character and you're kind of a little... tiny bit exactly the same <3 ) but you really shape the environment.

It is natural for us to want to discuss Cantr. Those people who can't vent their frustration on the forums or elsewhere, maybe they release it in game. I surely have. Usually I tried to channel it into good things, but the more I knew, the closer I got to the X. It's a natural social thing that we want to chat and get involved more, but I don't want more people to be active in the community if it's going to do what it's done to the current group. Almost all of the people I've talked to avoid saying much on the forums or regret learning as much as they've learnt.

What I've been meaning to ask is: Do you think it's possible to put some magic back in? Can we make it a place where people feel more encouraged rather than berated, so it doesn't feed back into game and set players against players? Where people don't feel that need to know more OOC information and become more involved than they'd like in the end? Where we're more open to the various play styles of people who each see Cantr differently? I don't want more people to end up with an inbuilt commentary like you or quitting like me, or somewhere frustratedly in between.

[Moonflame]

Come out and face me! *hops around on her toes, jabbing punches forwards into the air*

We want magic! *chants*

[Marian]

I already talked to you!

Hush or I'll start busting out with Britney videos too.