Funny or interesting IC quotes

[Rebma]

Re-reading old logs lately, and I miss Old Doryiskom. Especially Zara and Ceddric and the general humour there
True cantr-style bottom to top

2424-6: Rutho says: "*smiles worriedly at the Doryiskom Market* I think we should be more worried for that young man. I hope Zara can get through to him."
2424-5: Surname Firstname says: "When he does calm down he should be weight tested, we left a few things out in The Doryiskom Market."
2424-4: Gabriella says: "I just meant he may have been intimidated by your skills at collecting mushrooms.. It was a joke. *she sighs* No matter. I'm sure he'll adjust."
2424-3: No One says: "*he stares, his face mangled with a look of utter surprise and confusion* Gather what? Scare who? *he squints cautiously at the Medical Center* I feel confused and very disturbed by individual, but seem weirdly interesting."
2424-3: Gabriella says: "Well.. he hasn't come running out yet, so I'm guessing she hasn't scared him yet..."
2424-3: Gabriella says: "*laughs and shakes her head*"
2424-2: You see Zara leaving the central area of Doryiskom, entering Doryiskom Medical Center.
2424-2: You see Zara knocking on the door to Doryiskom Medical Center.
2424-2: Zara says: "I'll go."
2424-2: You see freaked out leaving the central area of Doryiskom, entering Doryiskom Medical Center.
2424-2: freaked out says: "** tries another door **"
2424-2: You see freaked out knocking on the door to Realm of the Wonderful.
2424-2: freaked out says: "** tries another door **"
2424-2: freaked out says: "** runs into the door of the fuel warehouse **"
2424-2: Jenna E. says: "Well, that didn't work so well."
2424-2: You see freaked out knocking on the door to Fuel Warehouse.
2424-2: You see Jenna E. entering Doryiskom, coming from Doryiskom Market.
2424-2: freaked out says: "** finds another place to hide ** EEEEEEEEEEEEEPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
2424-2: You see freaked out entering Doryiskom, coming from Doryiskom Market.
2424-2: Gabriella says: "Oh, nevermind. Jenna's on it."
2424-2: Gabriella says: "*laughs* I'll do it. "
2424-2: You see Jenna E. leaving the central area of Doryiskom, entering Doryiskom Market.
2424-2: Jenna E. says: "I'll do it."
2424-2: Snow says: "Not me......He ran away form me."
2424-2: Gabriella says: "I guess we need to elect someone to talk to him.."
2424-2: You see freaked out leaving the central area of Doryiskom, entering Doryiskom Market.
2424-2: freaked out says: "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!! ** gets freaked out when more than one person talks to him **"
2424-2: Gabriella says: "*she grins* New guy, its okay. Most of us don't bite."
2424-2: Snow says: "I'm Snow Byrde-Gwen. *gives a non-threatening little wave*"
2424-2: freaked out says: "** backs away from Gabriella. for whatever reason he appears to be scared of people **"
2424-2: Gabriella says: "Hey, new guy. I'm Gabriella. What's your name?"
2424-2: freaked out says: "** struggles o make sense of the papers the man gave him, then drops him. he looks at the man strangely **..........."
2424-2: Gabriella says: "I think it may have been someone even younger. *she points to No One* Maybe his expert gathering skills scared him off."
2424-2: You see freaked out drop note.
2424-2: You see freaked out drop note.
2424-2: Gabriella says: "*she laughs* I'm so sure that's it Ceddric. You saying I'm scary looking? Intimidating?"
2424-2: freaked out says: ".............."
2424-2: freaked out says: "** eyes shift from left to right as he wakes up **"
2424-2: Edward says: "It must be the mushrooms, No One. I haven't been around them before."
2424-2: Rutho says: "*chuckles*"
2424-2: No One says: "*he looks at Edward* Edward, use grammar better. Not confuse words. *he grins, a bit ironically*"
2424-2: Ceddric Byrde-Gwen says: "See? He didn´t run away this time. It wasn´t me who scared him away. Must have been... *glances at Gabriella* ...a younger person, who was standing closer to him. *grins*"
2424-2: No One says: "Edward, trying to juggle? *he watches Edward drop and pick up the knife*"
2424-2: Edward says: "I known as Edward."
2424-2: No One says: "*he stares* Newspawn, okay? Scream from seeing Ceddric? *he laughs* Maybe weapon scary. *he grins brightly* Stay for while, see how town is, before leave."
2424-2: You see Edward take a brand new bone knife.
2424-2: You see Edward drop a brand new bone knife.
2424-2: Edward says: "Don't worry. I have Claymore envy. It's sort of similiar."
2424-2: Rutho says: "*smiles at the man who returned* Hello, my name is Rutho."
2424-2: Ceddric Byrde-Gwen says: "*stares at the newspawn*"
2424-2: Ceddric Byrde-Gwen says: "Welcome back, young man."
2424-2: Edward says: "Claymore panic?"
2424-2: You see freaked out arriving in Doryiskom, coming from expressway to Sanctuary Mountain (klojt Mountain).
2424-2: Gabriella says: "Zara, you and Ceddric were in the first few to talk to me I believe."
2424-2: Zara says: "*smiles* I remember when I spawned. Little John was the first person who talked to me."
2424-2: Gabriella says: "*she grins* I remember getting that mixed up when I spawned too. Awfully common."
2424-2: Edward says: "*laughs*"
2424-2: Ceddric Byrde-Gwen says: "I don´t know. Maybe he misheard "Welcome to Doryiskom" for "please scream and run away without food". These two sentences do sound very similar."
2424-2: Gabriella says: "Apparently he was afraid of Ceddric. *she squints her eyes, examining him* I guess I can understand that."
2424-2: No One says: "Huh. What happen with him?"
2424-2: Ceddric Byrde-Gwen says: "*shakes his head and mutters* Newspawns..."
2424-2: Gabriella says: "*she blinks and looks to the road then back at Ceddric*"
2424-2: You see freaked out leaving Doryiskom, taking expressway to Sanctuary Mountain (klojt Mountain).
2424-2: freaked out says: "** runs away **"
2424-2: freaked out says: "** gets scared and freaks out ** !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
2424-2: You see Ceddric Byrde-Gwen talking to freaked out.
2424-2: You see Ceddric Byrde-Gwen give note to freaked out.
2424-2: You see Ceddric Byrde-Gwen give note to freaked out.
2424-2: You notice freaked out whom you haven`t seen before.

[*Wiro]

Reading old logs makes me realise how much I need a new Tsukune Aono in my Cantr. I cut out all the other stuff people said because they're boring anyway and I'm a bit lazy. Also to anyone that was there, I'm deliberately ignoring the fact (literally) half of his messages were (ooc: getting some coffee/why isn't anyone talking/how does this work) so don't worry about that -- I'm aware he's not perfect.

Bottom to top!

4387-0: Tsukune Aono says: "well that was embarrissing"
4387-0: Tsukune Aono says: "*he bursts out of the water, splashing every where* i cant swim, some one....*realizes its shallow and stands up, out of the water*"

suffers from ocd and depression from his lost fioncee who he believed was real. no real evidence has been said that he lived a life before this one besides that he carries around a photo of him and his wife and also has a bit of long silver hair that he carries in his journal.

4387-1: Tsukune Aono says: "thats discusting Red. i dont even think Mykola would want them back" (in response to Red stuffing stolen coins in her bra)

---
(as he first meets Red, the fat woman in town)

4387-1: Tsukune Aono says: "your not fat Red. im sorry but can you just put your skirt over your legs. its a bit open *he then starts feeling very awkward and looks it too*"
4387-1: Tsukune Aono says: "Red im sorry for calling you fat....big bonned. its just im usually around myslef, where the only thing that has any skin............... okay im just being weird now. ill just shut up."
4387-1: Tsukune Aono says: "well no offence red, its just that you got a little bit of fa.......no come, im not that skinny, im just small bonned"
4387-1: Tsukune Aono says: "thats gross. *he tries to throw up due to Reds fat physique* "

[cutecuddlydirewolf]

A woman trying to take care of a younger woman, who seems to be insane... I'm sorry, I just find this absolutely hilarious. XD It's as if she's talking to a small child.
Read from bottom to top!

A woman in her thirties says: "I hope you are able to take care of yourself despite your difficulties. If not, I will help to ensure you are taken care of. *she nods*"
A woman in her twenties says: "*she blinks and shakes her head* Great hand-touch control… Lavender not do, not say, only see. *she points up at the sky* Green…"
A woman in her thirties says: "That's very strange. Perhaps you are mentally compromised?"
A woman in her twenties says: "*she sighs softly* Not know. See… green box. Green orange white yellow… with moon fishes and carrot bugs and wanderers."
: A woman in her thirties says: "Good. You are very smart."
A woman in her twenties says: "Shakti not Shatki…"
A woman in her thirties says says: "Yes. *she smiles* Good work."
A woman in her twenties says: "*she blinks, tilting her head the other way* Shakti?"

[*Wiro]

Ashley's Rules For The Kitchen

Welcome to the Kitchen! Please be careful where you step, there are spiders in here!

The Chain of Command in the Kitchen is as follows:
-Cook
-Cook
-Cook
-Cook
Ask the Management if you are unsure of where you are in the Chain of Command.

Fingernail inspections every Thursday. No exceptions!

No live animals are allowed in the kitchen (unless they have expressed a keen
interest in the culinary arts, then by all means, they are welcome, we don't
discriminate)!

In event of fire/explosion/flooding/catastrophe, leave everything and exit the
building in an orderly fashion. No hiding in the cellar as the lone survivor trying
to ride it out! This is a terrible idea, it never works, and it'll be weeks before
we find your frozen body.

Above all, relax, enjoy, and have fun!

[Bmot]

Ashley's Rules For The Kitchen

Welcome to the Kitchen! Please be careful where you step, there are spiders in here!

The Chain of Command in the Kitchen is as follows:
-Cook
-Cook
-Cook
-Cook
Ask the Management if you are unsure of where you are in the Chain of Command.

Fingernail inspections every Thursday. No exceptions!

No live animals are allowed in the kitchen (unless they have expressed a keen
interest in the culinary arts, then by all means, they are welcome, we don't
discriminate)!

In event of fire/explosion/flooding/catastrophe, leave everything and exit the
building in an orderly fashion. No hiding in the cellar as the lone survivor trying
to ride it out! This is a terrible idea, it never works, and it'll be weeks before
we find your frozen body.

Above all, relax, enjoy, and have fun!

*chuckles*

Slightly annoyed by the "thursday" part though... Weeks, alright, I can live with those, but thursdays really don't exist

[Snickie]

Top-to-bottom:

4734-3.18: You see a horse attack XY.
4734-5.04: XY says: "*Smiles*"

This made me laugh.

[Majix]

Found a note in the mountains with the title:

"The thief took the road"

The thief took the road to Xxxxx. We can't take that
road with the cars so we will take another road there.
Day 4468 at 1:16

YYYY COME DAY 4468 AT 7:7. YYYY ALONE. YYYY GO KILL THIEF NOW. YYYY
EXTRA MAD CUZ THIEF NOW STEAL ROAD TOO LIKE TITLE SAY! YYYY GO THIEF ROAD TO Xxxx NOW.

[cutecuddlydirewolf]

Laughing madly, indeed... This guy is absolutely hilarious. XD

A man in his thirties says: "*shakes head* And giving tempers a few days to cool, mightn't be the worst of ideas. *chuckles* I may have a job, docking at harbours, and pointing out all the ways I could, if it was interesting, swipe a bunch of stuff. And then pretend to do so, and get chased across the sea, laughing madly with my stolen screwdriver."

And then there's these lovely gems about potato liquor:

A man in his thirties says: "Makes the eyes tear, and face burn, so probably not drinkable, but still. Potato."

A man in his thirties says: "One trader had some for their car. Wow did it sting. Sharp acrid smell, plus all the sadness that so many potatoes got put in a fire, to power a car, stead of being lovingly baked and eaten."

[Marian]

Laughing madly, indeed... This guy is absolutely hilarious. XD

A man in his thirties says: "*shakes head* And giving tempers a few days to cool, mightn't be the worst of ideas. *chuckles* I may have a job, docking at harbours, and pointing out all the ways I could, if it was interesting, swipe a bunch of stuff. And then pretend to do so, and get chased across the sea, laughing madly with my stolen screwdriver."

And then there's these lovely gems about potato liquor:

A man in his thirties says: "Makes the eyes tear, and face burn, so probably not drinkable, but still. Potato."

A man in his thirties says: "One trader had some for their car. Wow did it sting. Sharp acrid smell, plus all the sadness that so many potatoes got put in a fire, to power a car, stead of being lovingly baked and eaten."

I think I know this character.

[dekalina]

I think everybody know somebody, who loves patatoes.

[Marian]

Pie is also a fun and popular topic.

4670-5: Not telling says: "But is there time to stop at NOPE, amidst all this sailing and pie-eating?"

4670-5: A mysterious unnamed man in his twenties: "*shakes head*No. Pie."

4670-5: Not telling says: "What if we, like...multi-task, and eat pie while docking to NOPE? *shrugging after a thoughtful moment* Though honestly it's not like there's anything there we really /need/ from there except maybe a little mysterious unnamed resource. Mostly I was just thinking we should be neighborly and say hi. "

4670-5: A mysterious unnamed man in his twenties: "*folds a note into a circle with a rim, and puts some feathers and sugar in the 'pie-tin'* Piiiieeeee."

4670-5: A mysterious unnamed man in his twenties: "*shakes himself* Sorry. Got locked in pie mode. Sure, lets dock and see."

4670-5: Not telling says: "*sighs and looks heavenward for patience* See, this is why I want Steve onboard. We can make him a co-captain in addition to mascot and then he can have the tie-breaking vote whenever we have a disagreement like this. One bleat for yes and one for no. *after a pause* And I will have to interpret for him, of course."

4670-5: Not telling says: "*grins* Oh good, pie mode disengaged. I was about to have to start searching you for an off switch."

4670-5: Not telling says: "...and that might get awkward for both of us real quick."

4670-5: A mysterious unnamed man in his twenties says: "*nods* Yup. Worse if you found one, worse worse if you didn't."

4670-5: A mysterious unnamed man in his twenties: "Or snapped the lever, and PIE MODE LOCKED"

4670-5: A mysterious unnamed man in his twenties: "Have to introduce people to me, as NOPE, the pie guy. That'd get old fast."

[Friar Briar]

Girls From Puk

From bottom to top:

4742-2.06: You hear from radio at freq. 100: "Well, I hope ya landlubbers enjoyed this special broadcast. This 'as been [redacted] with Pirate Radio. See ya next time, mateys!"

4742-2.06: You hear from radio at freq. 100: "*more artless twanging on the fiddle*"

4742-2.06: You hear from radio at freq. 100: "So 'eave away, me bully, bully boys / 'Eave 'er up and don't ya eat no grapes / And we're bound away fer Treefeather!"

4742-2.06: You hear from radio at freq. 100: "[Loose sail, me lads, all together!]"

4742-2.06: You hear from radio at freq. 100: "Girls from Puk ain't got no jewels / They got robbed fer their stupid rules"

4742-2.06: You hear from radio at freq. 100: "[Loose sail, me lads, loose sail!]"

4742-2.06: You hear from radio at freq. 100: "Girls from Puk ain't got no grapes / Ya try ta buy 'em an' just get japes"

4742-2.06: You hear from radio at freq. 100: "['Eave 'ard, me lads, all together!]"

4742-2.06: You hear from radio at freq. 100: "Girls from Puk ain't got no manners / They drive newspawns ta pirate banners"

4742-2.06: You hear from radio at freq. 100: "['Eave 'ard, me lads, 'eave 'ard!]"

4742-2.06: You hear from radio at freq. 100: "Girls from Puk ain't got no style / Their clothes are black an' they don't smile "

4742-2.05: You hear from radio at freq. 100: "*a cheerful song played badly on a creaky old fiddle, then some truly abominable singing*"

4742-2.05: You hear from radio at freq. 100: "Anyway, today's episode is about...sea shanties! Sea shanties are an important part o' sailor culture, ya know, and that goes fer pirates too. They 'elp ta keep the rhythm when doin' 'ard labor aboard a ship, like haulin' sail or weighin' anchor. Sea shanties are often adapted from popular shorebound songs an' adjusted ta keep pace with the labor. 'Ere's one I wrote meself! I call it "Girls from Puk"."

4742-2.05: You hear from radio at freq. 100: "Arrrr, listen up, ye landlubbin' wankers! It's time fer today's episode o' Pirate Radio! This 'ere's yer friendly 'ost, [redacted], sometimes known as [redacted]! I'm broadcastin' from the lovely seaside town of...well, never ya mind that. But the weather 'ere's just smashin', nary a cloud in the sky and a good strong sea wind. Who knows where it'll take us next?"

4742-2.05: You hear from radio at freq. 100: "*a brash female voice with a thick Cockney accent* Is this thing workin'? *the sound of someone tapping loudly on the radio, followed by an ear-bleeding feedback screech* Ah, sod it. *a throat clearing loudly*"

[*Wiro]

The entire episode in Moku North was hilarious. Julie Jones is hilarious.
You can read it here since it's incredibly long.

[Marian]

The entire episode in Moku North was hilarious. Julie Jones is hilarious.
You can read it here since it's incredibly long.

That was great. What a magical existence, just rolling from town to town trolling and utterly confusing everyone they met.

[Rebma]

I forgot Abigail ran everyone over haha.