Anti-Jokes

[kroner]

oops.... heh. yes, hard to be on a dessert island without food... that went right over my head...

[rklenseth]

Like I said, cast iron sinks....

[new.vogue.nightmare]

It doesn't sink if you shoot it straight up out of a cannon!

...Well, not immediately anyway... o.o;;;

[Bowser]

...stranded on a dessert island

MMMMmmmmmm, island

[David]

What do the maintenance and cleaning staff at Alamo Hotel chain do to commemorate the Alamo?

Kill all the Gringos.

[Mitch]

You might be a redneck if... Northern city-dwellers mock your isolated rural heritage, and utilize stereotypes referencing your supposed appetite for fornication with family relations, and your almost simian intelligence to further demean you.

What do you get when you cross Mariah Carey and Elton John?
Nothing. Elton John prefers men.

[Mavsfan911]

LOL!! those are rough but hilarious

[Psycho Pixie]

So the donkey says to the Zebra... "why are you striped in black and white? the grass is brown and green"

the Zebra says in reply, "The lion sees in color you idiot so shut up, he cant see me."

The donkey, sad because the zebra is obviously confused shakes his head and sighs "no, my friend, the lion sees only black and white, you are mistaken, he will see you long before he sees my brown coat of fur."

Suddenly, a lion bursts from the bush and eats the donkey.

If he sees black and white why did he eat you not me??????

The lion turns to the zebra and says "because i only kill jack asses.

get it? get it??? a jack ass!!! i did good!!!!


The every sarcastic and insanely silly:
Psycho Pixie

[west]

Tasteful Joke:
Q: How many surrealist painters does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Fish.

Tasteless joke:
Q: What's the difference between dead babies and hamburger?
A: $1.39 per pound.

[Báng]

Heard this joke today...you have to say it with two people near you and use their names...so I'll just use...ramdon names.

Three men, Shane, David and Indio, where out one night drinking, as the night went on they had another and another and by the end of the night they could barely walk. But they hopped into a car anyway....and as they were drunk they crashed the car.

They went to heaven and God told them, 'Your not coming in, you shouldn't have been drink driving'. Shane said, 'Give us one more chance God, we'll not do it again.' So God said they had one more chance, but if they stepped on a frog their lives would be a living hell. They all thought, good deal, whats the chances of stepping on a frog!

The next day when they were back on earth Shane stepped on a frog, and the ugliest woman in the world magically connected to him. David and Indio thought this was hilarious and laughed at Shane. A few weeks went by and David then stepped on a frog, and amazing the worlds second ugliest woman magically connected to him.

As the months went on, Shane and David living their lives with the ugly women connected to them, and Indio still hadn't stepped on a frog.

Then one day the three men met up again, but this time Indio had the most beautiful woman in the world connected to him. Shane and David were stunned, David said 'What the hell happened you!?'. The woman turned around to the two men and butted in, 'I don't know what happened you two, but I stepped on a f*cking frog!'

[Bran-Muffin]

good stuff

[west]

Heh. Saw this on the FBI.gov page. Thought it was funny.