Sock Gremlins!

[Psycho Pixie]

Well, it's not my fault you people NEVER SLEEP. :P

CHILDREN! do not talk about nukes and crap. i wont ask nice again. lets go back to the topic sortof ok?!?!?!?! dont make me break out the pixie dust on your butts and vanish the posts!

[thingnumber2]

ok!
Is there some kinda of gremlin that wraps up all your cords together, after they are all put out perfectly straight and not touching?

[Psycho Pixie]

ok!
Is there some kinda of gremlin that wraps up all your cords together, after they are all put out perfectly straight and not touching?

Most gremlins, should they feel the urge to be bratty... will do that, along with other stuff.

[thingnumber2]

ok, I was wondering about that...

[Psycho Pixie]

oh my god! the sock gremlin posts have stopped! AHHHH gimmie a day or so, i will have a new update i promise.

what with all the negociations for gremlin POW's i have been to busy to report! so sorry! really!


Psycho Pixie

[thingnumber2]

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh! um...is that a good thing...or a bad thing..

[Psycho Pixie]

The Gremlin General, Clofdum managed to gain an amazingly fast victory over much of the "Dirtlands" with his large, well trained army. It was rather reminicent of the Roman Legions sweeping over all the small Clans of old Europe. Except I am pretty sure they used no poison, treason r backstabbing in this quick efficient victory.

General Clofdum was very proud of his army's professionalism in that they did not raid, pillage or rape any of "the Enemy's" territories or people. There were however an enormous number of Prisoners taken by the Captains of the army. The leaders of the Dirtclans represent only a few of the Gremlins in the stockades at this time. Only notables will be ransomed or permitted leave to return home at a later date.

Clan names, leaders, as well as ransom amounts are listed below.

Treeclan, blugum~leader: Chewshard~ ransom: 100 new white socks.
Treeclan, Redgum~leader: Fallsoften~ Ransom: 85 clean brown socks
Dirtclan, Redclay~ leader: Watersmuch~ ransom: 250 womens undies.
Dirtclan, Rocksthick~ leader: Spotslyte~ransom: 170 left foot socks
Lakeclan, Fishsmel~ leader: Troutsdie~ ransom: 38 mens boxers
Lakeclan, Candywrap~ leader: Grudgful~ ransom: 56 mens briefs
Streetclan, Hardsoil~ leader: grabslots~ ransom: 100 36c bra's

~5 clans not listed.~

Lands now under the Generals law:

Southdirtville (Temecula California)
Midhills (Wildomar California)
Groves (east side Lake Elsinore, California)
lakewash (Central, Lake side Lake Elsinore California)

Areas of minor rebellion are:

Colonial dirtsville( Murrietta, california)
Outlands( Anza, and East Temecula California)

Still at war and un-controled:

Eastdessert( Perris California)


This concluded the Gremlin war report for the dates Feb, 1, 2004 thru feb. 16, 2004.

Psycho Pixie

[west]

Streetclan, Hardsoil~ leader: grabslots~ ransom: 100 36c bra's

funny, that was my ransom too...

[Psycho Pixie]

oh... there are reasons the gremlins want those items for ransom. All of them has uses to the army.

for instance, those Bra's... a 36c is perfect for a gremlin to use as a hammock. and a bra therefore fits 2 gremlins. 100 bras are perfect new beds for the 200 new archers in the unit that just formed. the left foot socks are good sleepingbags. and the boxers are like huge sheets of fabric for uniforms.

hehe just thought you might wanna know.

Psycho Pixie

[1959 Apache]

Pixie, I don't know how to tell you this, but based on the location of the warfare, I may have had a hand in starting all of it. How is that, you ask? All the way from Pennsylvania?

The fact is, back on July 4 weekend 1999, I purchased that beautiful 1959 pickup truck that is my avatar. The location of the purchase was in Sun City, which happens to be right within the war zone. The truck had been sitting in one spot for quite a while. When I first looked at the truck there were these strange looking granules all through the bed. There were lots of very small pieces of paper with writing too small to make out. There also were small footprints in the dust, that were made by some then unknown animal. The guy I bought it from, said he sometimes heard noises coming from the area of the truck, but never saw anything. The winshield wipers were strangely missing, too.

Is it possible, that this truck was used as a headquarters or meeting place? Could the wipers now be part of the armament that is being used? Could the granules have been droppings? Could the papers have been plans or maps?

I now believe that removing the truck upset the gremlin world, causing them to have to find another location to assemble. Would it have taken 4 and a half years for them to have migrated to finally settle on your house? These seem to be more than chance occurances. The truck, as old as it is, is surprisingly gremlin free. Is it true that gremlins do not infest their own structures?

[Psycho Pixie]

Pixie, I don't know how to tell you this, but based on the location of the warfare, I may have had a hand in starting all of it. How is that, you ask? All the way from Pennsylvania?

The fact is, back on July 4 weekend 1999, I purchased that beautiful 1959 pickup truck that is my avatar. The location of the purchase was in Sun City, which happens to be right within the war zone. The truck had been sitting in one spot for quite a while. When I first looked at the truck there were these strange looking granules all through the bed. There were lots of very small pieces of paper with writing too small to make out. There also were small footprints in the dust, that were made by some then unknown animal. The guy I bought it from, said he sometimes heard noises coming from the area of the truck, but never saw anything. The winshield wipers were strangely missing, too.

Is it possible, that this truck was used as a headquarters or meeting place? Could the wipers now be part of the armament that is being used? Could the granules have been droppings? Could the papers have been plans or maps?

I now believe that removing the truck upset the gremlin world, causing them to have to find another location to assemble. Would it have taken 4 and a half years for them to have migrated to finally settle on your house? These seem to be more than chance occurances. The truck, as old as it is, is surprisingly gremlin free. Is it true that gremlins do not infest their own structures?

while I can comfortably say that your truck is not the original starting place for the recent wars... I can give you a bit more history on the truck you told me about.

Approxamatly 15 years ago, a cult of gremlin was begun. Now, keep in mind this cult was not gremlins, but people, who whorshipped and idolized gremlins as a truer form of life. Not much has been discovered regarding the cult, as it was very secretive.

But, we do know for fact that the Cult leader lived in Suncity, and loved Chevy trucks with a passion. The cultist went missing about 5 years ago. Not to say that you bought the truck from the cult leader, but most likely from one of his misguided followers. Or it could even be that the person who owned the truck before you was totally un-aware of the trucks importance to the group.

In conclusion, I can tell you that yes, your truck was once a haven for hundreds of gremlins, most likely the camping ground of several Dirtclans. It may even be te birthing place of many of the gremlins now in the army below my house.

I will drop an inquirey down to them and see what their priests and historians come up with.

Psycho Pixie

[Psycho Pixie]

in regards to the truck ::

the priest of the local sept says what you have is a relic from one of the desicrated holy grounds.... because it was removed from a gremlin holy site (i.e. a birthing home) it is technically cursed....

but, he says that since you believe in the existance of gremlins, and removed the relic without knowing it was holy, he will forgive you and to remove the potencial curse you must build a small shrine to the gremlin Gods...

God: Bobble, a shrine for bobble can be a small bobble headed ornament of about the same size a gremlin is.. thats about 4 inches tall and 2 inches wide. give or take a bit.

Goddess: fluffy, to whorship, or build a shrine to fluffy: any small furry stuffed animal with lots of bright colors needs to be placed in the truck someplace.

if you do both those things, it will disenchant the curse which we think hasnt gone active just yet. but it is a ticking timebomb of a curse that will result in the total breakdown of the trucks entire engine block. the priest cant garentee that these steps will prevent that from happening, since the truck is welll...... old.


Psycho Pixie

[1959 Apache]

I knew there was something special about that truck. I could feel it. It is as if there is a presence within it, a good presence, though. Like it was being protected. The spirits of hundreds of gremlins must ride with me whenever I drive it.

They must know I am friendly, or surely there would have been some form of retribution by now. Even still, I will follow the priest's instructions. Bobble and Fluffy will be praised. I will provide evidence as soon as I complete my task.

Please assure the priest that I intend to preserve the truck as it was. It is currently completely disassembled so I can rustproof every piece. I will be reassembling it this summer. My intent is for it to be the last truck I ever have to buy. It has lasted 45 years now, I just need it to last another 40. I do not abuse my vehicles, so the presence will not be disturbed or disrespected. When it is all complete and running again, I am planning a trip with it to Arizona. If the priest can give me his word that no harm will come to me or the truck, I will return to the site which it once stood. It would only be a matter of several more hours of driving, just to show my commitment to preserving their holy site.

[Psycho Pixie]

The Sept Head Priest will be very glad to hear that this wonderful old holy relic will be cherished as it should be.

if for some reason after you re-assemble the truck, you find it is not well inhabited by good gremlins, when you visit here, i am sure some will take up resedence.

Psycho Pixie

[Psycho Pixie]

what? no sock gremlin questions???? oh my gods! i think the world might end.


Psycho Pixie