Unflattering emotes...

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Otherside
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Location: Cult Classics, not Best Sellers

Unflattering emotes...

Postby Otherside » Thu Sep 04, 2014 1:34 pm

Just a bit of a laugh, any stupid or bad analogies you've heard, or thought of... that you definitely should? / shouldn't write!

*their love burned with the fiery intensity of a urinary tract infection*

*joy filled her heart like a fart fills a room with no windows*

*when she tried to sing, it sounded like a walrus giving birth to farm equipment*

*her eyes twinkled, like the moustache of a man with a cold*
You speak in every curling wave and sing in every violent breeze.
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Addicted
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Location: Australia

Re: Unflattering emotes...

Postby Addicted » Thu Sep 04, 2014 1:36 pm

Not emotes but lovers endearments:

"your teeth are like the stars, they come out at night"

And yes, I have had the next one used on me...
"your eyes are so beautiful, they look at each other"
then I married him anyway.
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Tangential
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Re: Unflattering emotes...

Postby Tangential » Thu Sep 04, 2014 7:36 pm

Otherside wrote:
*their love burned with the fiery intensity of a urinary tract infection*

*joy filled her heart like a fart fills a room with no windows*



Those are amazing. They SHOULD be written just so I can laugh.
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SekoETC
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Re: Unflattering emotes...

Postby SekoETC » Thu Sep 04, 2014 8:02 pm

There used to be this one character in QFN who was really awful at playing the violin. I wish I could remember how it was described, because it was awesome.
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Otherside
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Re: Unflattering emotes...

Postby Otherside » Thu Sep 04, 2014 8:53 pm

*she was like a magnet, attractive from the back, repulsive from the front*

*his eyes were like the stars, not because they sparkle, but because they were so far apart*
You speak in every curling wave and sing in every violent breeze.
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*Wiro
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Re: Unflattering emotes...

Postby *Wiro » Thu Sep 04, 2014 9:48 pm

I'm a huge fan of this emoting style. The more negativity the better, it's a welcome change from the flood of beauty in Cantr. Especially when people comment on that oversized nose or a girl's manly shoulders.
Read about my characters by following this link.
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kicking jay
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Re: Unflattering emotes...

Postby kicking jay » Thu Sep 04, 2014 10:51 pm

These are hilarious. I wish I had half this skill.
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Otherside
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Re: Unflattering emotes...

Postby Otherside » Fri Sep 05, 2014 12:32 pm

kicking jay wrote:These are hilarious. I wish I had half this skill.


Believe it or not most of those were stolen from high school kids. It's not always skill, just thinking outside the box. :D

"You can take for granted that people know more or less what a street, a shop, a beach, a sky, an oak tree look like. Tell them what makes this one different." - Neil Gaiman
You speak in every curling wave and sing in every violent breeze.
RoselynKane
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Joined: Tue Sep 09, 2014 8:40 am

Re: Unflattering emotes...

Postby RoselynKane » Tue Sep 09, 2014 8:43 am

nice post

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