Cantr II Discussion Forum

It's simple, a rolling story that carries on with each post. It's no holds barred until the forum moniter says, "Hey... hey... HEY!"

I'll kick this off.

So there I was in the middle of the Iraqi dessert with an MRE beanut butter packet, and a piece of stale heavy bread. All I had on me was my kevlar helmet, flak vest with three big knives, and a pair of Spounge Bob boxers . I hadn't had my morning cigarette or cup of coffee yet, and my M16-2A was in dire need of cleaning. The morning dessert sun hadn't fully risen yet, and my stomach was growling for mess hall powered eggs, and burnt toast. When suddenly, from beyond the sand dunes and C-wire came...

.....a half naked Sparkle. Her car had broke down a few miles from where she was. She looked tired and worn out. All of a sudden she began to run. It appears to be.........

...a cammel in heat. Sparkle was the most beautiful creature he had seen in the entire dessert, but the cammel was half mad after losing his mate to an IED. Path, seeing this damzel in distress took aim with his weapon and...

...missed completely, because his sponge bob boxers were, appropriately, child-sized. The pain in his groin caused his arm to spontaneously twitch, showering Sparkle's car with bullets.
One hit the gas tank, and....

...and he takes cover, and waits, And waits, AND... nothing happens because the only real car problem she had was that she was out of gas . As the cammel approaches her, a friend is awaken from the shots fired and sees what was going on, he takes aim and...

The friend takes aim and...Suddenly realizes he's in bum *bleeped* egypt. He sighs heavily but gets in the worshiping position and begins to pray to allah-hoping someone will get him out of this mess because the lord knows- GWB sure won't.

The camel raises his head and...

...succombs to a heat stroke. A mysterious fellow who had toilet paper wrapped around his head came up to the car, shrieks, then runsaway, minutes later a glint in the sky appears, followed by whistling bombs falling down on...

...him filled with leaflets saying, "WAKE UP DAMMIT, WAKE UP!!! IT'S JUST A DREAM! DEJ FGEH BREIW." Everyone in that dream world starts to click their heels three times and chants, "There's no place like Cantr. There's no place like Cantr..." Then POOF, everyone reapears in a green space with men and women in their twenties, thrities, and forties are digging for potatoes, coal, and hematite. speaking in OOC language...

..."OOC- There's a bug in the system, please standby as we delete the source problem, Rising Path Militia's account" A voice from the forum's past spoke then, "resolved," and the throngs of people...

...got down and boogied!

934-8: a man in his twenties says "*gets down and boogies*"
934-8: a man in his twenties says "*boogies*"
934-8: a woman in her twenties says "*gets down and boogies*"
934-8: a man in his twenties says "OOC: What's boogies, and how do I eat?"

*she notices all the people in Cantr world are fighting for food and doesn't see all the iron lying on the ground....she runs to pick it up and.......

strains her back as the load was over 15 kilos. The dead camel walks over to her with a cigerette in his front hoof saying. "Hey there lady, ya need any help?"

...How about you and me raid and pillage the cantrside?" The dead cammel put's out his cigarette, and hands her a sabre and iron shield. "But here's the deal, I can either carry you or your load. Not both." Mean while, Path dart's into a hemp storage silo, because he realized HE'S WEARING NOTHING WORTH MENTIONING !!! Quickly he fassions himself a crude pair of hemp boxers, and man were they itchy. Path pokes his head out of the silo and...

RisingPathMilitia wrote:...How about you and me raid and pillage the cantrside?" The dead cammel put's out his cigarette, and hands her a sabre and iron shield. "But here's the deal, I can either carry you or your load. Not both." Mean while, Path dart's into a hemp storage silo, because he realized HE'S WEARING NOTHING WORTH MENTIONING !!! Quickly he fassions himself a crude pair of hemp boxers, and man were they itchy. Path pokes his head out of the silo and...

trips onto a path. He decides he stinks so much that he needs to take a bath. Of course though, if he sat in a curing tub, where leather is made, his skin would really feel the wrath. He can't figure out why he must need salt to clean his inexistent hygeine and decides to go back to school, to learn the math...

...To his dismay, his math class was being taught by the Dominatrix 'Pirate Lass'. With her whip and evil grimmice, she was able to teach the stinky thing in hemp the equation to be clean.

One Naughty Girl + One Empty Room + A Bar of Non-existant Cantarian Soap = One Sexy Scrub Down.

Sadly, however, since soap did not exist in the Cantr world, he was forced to stay dirty, running away in tears from Miss Dominatrix (She charged $300 for the session.)...