Thought or Rant of the day!!!

BlueNine · Postby **BlueNine** » Sun May 24, 2009 11:49 pm

I'd suggest not retaliating to what they do, or at least not shouting/arguing...reply to their ridiculous arguments in a calm and collected manner (eg: She says you're a terrible son. Instead of calling her a bitch, say "it was your job to raise me") so that you can eventually build your own argument of "which one of us right now is acting like an adult?"

Another good line is the "why don't you sort your own life out before you start telling me how to live mine"...but be careful with that, can be asking for a hit and/or tears.

Arguments are like a game of chess...you won't win by throwing everything forward at once

Rebma · Postby **Rebma** » Mon May 25, 2009 12:46 am

It might be good in situations with grandparents and other relatives where you overhear them saying that to your parents to have a few choice relatives who's bad habits you know, especialy if those are the ones they are praising as better than you.

My stepmother used to tell me all these things about her friend's daughter (who I went to school with) being better than me because she did all these great things and helped out, etc, etc, until one day I snapped, and happened to let it slip that her best friend's daughter was a coke-head. My bad.

Anyways honestly after your grandparents leave, you need to talk to your parents and tell them you heard, and say something along the lines of that it hurt to not hear them defending you, especially in a situation where you can't defend yourself because you are just a child. And seriously play up the child thing, and play up the hurt thing, as if they shoulda been your saviors and you're broken (even if you're not). Then calmly walk away. Sometimes it takes mere minutes, sometimes a day, but eventually the guilt will eat at them so bad that you're bound to see a result, and hopefully a parent/child relationship level up.

And if not, at least they'll stop talking about you with others while you're around, and you've got future ammo.

chase02 · Postby **chase02** » Mon May 25, 2009 1:51 am

If you overhear them talking shit about you, why don't you confront them (calmly) and ask why they feel the need to do this behind your back (and poorly)?

Seems a better use of your time than whinging on a forum about it, and there is a chance it may actually achieve something.

kronos · Postby **kronos** » Mon May 25, 2009 9:03 am

Sunny all day and the one time for 15 min I'm walking home a shower has to pop up and soak me >.>

Dudel · Postby **Dudel** » Mon May 25, 2009 9:15 am

kronos wrote:Sunny all day and the one time for 15 min I'm walking home a shower has to pop up and soak me >.>

Life's a bitch, get an umbrella. :lol:

chase02 · Postby **chase02** » Mon May 25, 2009 9:31 am

You knew it was coming: Toughen up princess!

*Wiro · Postby *Wiro » Mon May 25, 2009 12:49 pm

I tried talking with them -many- times, but as soon as they realize I'm right, they go in denial-mode or walk away, or bring up completely irrelevant things about me. When I tell them that everytime I try to talk about it they do those things, they do the EXACT same things. And then an infinite loop starts until it is broken by either of us by yelling and then walking away. Most of the times I'm like "Ok, so you repeated a lot about what I did wrong, and I won't deny any of it, but I am expecting you not to deny that you were wrong as well." and then they act completely shocked as if they have no idea what I'm talking about and they just go on with their complaints about me.

And ugh, I wish we had rain here. The sun's way too hot and I'm tired.

Peanut · Postby **Peanut** » Mon May 25, 2009 6:23 pm

*Wiro wrote:I tried talking with them -many- times, but as soon as they realize I'm right, they go in denial-mode or walk away, or bring up completely irrelevant things about me. When I tell them that everytime I try to talk about it they do those things, they do the EXACT same things. And then an infinite loop starts until it is broken by either of us by yelling and then walking away. Most of the times I'm like "Ok, so you repeated a lot about what I did wrong, and I won't deny any of it, but I am expecting you not to deny that you were wrong as well." and then they act completely shocked as if they have no idea what I'm talking about and they just go on with their complaints about me.

And ugh, I wish we had rain here. The sun's way too hot and I'm tired.

Do as I did.
Ignore them.

joo · Postby **joo** » Mon May 25, 2009 6:33 pm

Peanut wrote:Do as I did.
Ignore them.

Yes, this is what I do. If I've told them my point of view on the matter and they still don't acknowledge it, I just refuse to talk anymore.

Sometimes they eventually realise that they were wrong and apologise, and if not they realise they aren't going to convince me of anything and come to an impasse of sorts. Or at least they just leave me alone.

Genie · Postby **Genie** » Mon May 25, 2009 7:19 pm

I don't like mondays:(

Diego · Postby **Diego** » Mon May 25, 2009 8:43 pm

Update! My heartbreak has transitioned into friendship successfully and we spent Sunday afternoon and night walking around the city, doing heroin and smoking pot from friends at public parks. Fun! And today I befriended and joined the circle of hippie artisans selling jewelry and incense and stuff on sidewalks. Great people. Life is great once more!

Wiro, it's almost impossible for someone who has lived significant portions of a long lifetime thinking in a given way to just up and turn and realize the error in their deeper values (or antivalues), particularly in a live conversation. Try writing a letter.

Mr. Black · Postby **Mr. Black** » Mon May 25, 2009 8:54 pm

Excellent, Diego! On another good note, I played baseball for two hours out in the sun, scoring four home runs. And then I smoked pot with my team and played Halo 3 for hours. Good fun. Also, I realized some excellent philosphy. I can have a crappy part-time job, as long as it keeps me alive and pays the rent. If I do, it means I have all the rest of my time to myself, and be happy. Ah, joy.

joo · Postby **joo** » Mon May 25, 2009 9:39 pm

I'm feeling quite satisfied with my life too, in the short term. I have no college or exams for the next week, am likely to soon recieve a deserved £120 as a result of some decisive signature fraud, am living in a hedonistic cycle of staying up with the aid of caffeine for long periods of time, sleeping whenever the fuck I want, and lazing about in minimalistic attire while engaging in the twin mental masturbations of playing Cantr and developing inconsequential projects coded in high-level, object-oriented syntax. And of course trolling.

Oh, and telling people about what I'm doing in overly verbose, drawn-out sentences.

*Wiro · Postby *Wiro » Mon May 25, 2009 10:02 pm

Oh I wrote a letter once. It ended up in the trash bin within seconds.

QueenofBlades · Postby **QueenofBlades** » Tue May 26, 2009 1:54 am

Wiro, baby, look--you gotta understand; being a teenager, it sucks. You have no say in your own life, everything's all this way and that way, your parents are total asshole....
Man, things were so bad with my mom she called the cops on me--several times. We broke things, got into physical fights, I mean the works.
Believe me, I've been through the wringer. She went so far as to lie to get me put in a mental institution.
Now, though? We're cool. I'm not sure exactly what happened or what change that made our relationship better, but man I'm tellin you--hang in there. It really sucks, yeah, but if you can get through it the stronger you'll be.
Sorry I've no better advice for you Wiro, but PM me if you need to talk, ok?

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