Cantr II Discussion Forum

I wonder why Cantr relationships generally tend to have the mentality of 'til death do us part'. If something doesn't work out, it's very difficult to admit it and instead you end up ignoring your mate until one of you has a heart attack or starves to death, and then the surviving party hooks up with someone new.

Out of my living characters:

First of all, I have 6 characters who have never had sex. That's sort of a relief.

Out of the others:

One has murdered a couple of girlfriends when they slept, and watched some have a heart attack or starve to death. Only one girl got away from him without dying, and that one dumped him. Even though things didn't always work out, he would never dump anyone.

Another one was in a polygamous relationship for decades and recently lost her girlfriend. The status was 'it's complicated' in Facebook terms for a long time, but she couldn't end it even though it hadn't worked out in a long time. It might have something to do with the fact that it's really hard to hook up with someone new when you're very old and not into vanilla stuff.

Third one isn't really interested in sex anymore and was celibate for many years, but this one guy clung onto her and she just didn't have the heart to deny him.

Fourth one was married for several years, then allowed his wife to starve to death because she had been asleep so long. Now years later he's combining assets with a woman he hardly even knows and they have never been intimate. Out of a sense of not wanting to be alone, and the woman is also a widow, so they're in the same boat.

Fifth one was a virgin for a really long time and really self-conscious about it, but when she finally had her first time, she was content with that, and actually has no pressing need to ever do it again. I'm not sure if that's the character's feeling or my own.

Sixth one had an awkward relationship with a woman and eventually helped her commit suicide. Later he fell in love with a woman who said she might never be ready to have sex. He was okay with that. Then one day she suddenly was ready. He was happy about that. Yet I as a player don't feel comfortable playing that character in bed because he has always been awkward. He spawned without knowing how sex works and thought there was something wrong with him when seeing an attractive woman caused a physical reaction in him. Years later that awkwardness still hasn't quite shattered away.

Seventh one is one of the few that I'm actually happy with. He doesn't have sex often but when he does, it's almost explosive, very intense.

Eighth one isn't really interested in sex but has had it a couple of time to strengthen her relationship. There was something magical about it last time. I like that her mate keeps it short. I hate it when people stretch it too much.

Ninth one recently came out of the closet when someone else was showing interest in the guy he was secretly in love with, but the problem is when the relationship was established, it eliminated the need to compete with anybody and took away the challenge. I'm not very good at rp'ing male gay relationships, maybe because I'm a girl in real life so I have no kind of contact surface. I don't personally even know any gay people irl so all I have is tv stereotypes, yet my character isn't stereotypical. I'm not sure how to play him since he changed a lot since he was a newspawn.

Here's my thoughts on it: Relationships add an interesting element to the game. Some of mine are "Til death do us part partners" but some are like yours and have interesting, crazy, or dynamic relationships. I think the relationship stuff adds an interesting dimension to the game, and helps characters develop unique personalities. I don't necessarily subscribe to traditional relationships in-game since it's all a fantasy, though in real life, I am monogamous.

Here are mine:

* First one has been with one and only one, and loves her with everything. They are getting married soon.
* Next one had a 10 year relationship that ended very badly. His gf was super sleepy, so he started flirting on the side. Then it ended up a hot mess and he had to choose. He chose the sleepy gf, who promptly got angry with him, and the other girl also got angry with him. The drama drove him to skip town and go sailing. He then fell in love with a woman on a different island, and he's trying to decide whether to settle down with her and become a dreadie "townie" (and he hates living the "townie life"), or keep sailing alone. Chances are it's going to be the latter.
* Next one is a widowed lesbian. She was submissive to a domineering gf who then fell into a deep sleep and starved.
* Next one was single for many years, but now has a girlfriend who is also his business and sailing partner. He has been faithful to her, despite being on a crew with him & 3 women.
* Next one was in an unhealthy relationship with a sleepy woman who gave up on life and killed herself. He fell for the one he truly loved soon after and is much happier.
* Next one is faithful to a loving man who she has known since the day she spawned. Both are wakeful but aren't intimate often. (I admit by my choice... too much of intimate RP can be overkill.)
* Next one was alone for a while, but she later fell in love with a younger woman. The two women were in a relationship with a man, but that man has since died.
* Next one was not allowed to have a lover in his first town, but he fell for another anyways. After being exiled from town over some craziness, he fell in love with another who fell victim to the sleeping disease and died. His grief at her long sleep drove him away from town #2 where he met a couple of travelling lover girls who let him become a "third wheel". Another woman came along and decided to join the fun, so he's got an interesting dynamic now. (Giggity giggity... for all you Family Guy fans).
* Next one has a completely platonic relationship with a woman he has been together with for a decade now. Her mind is not capable of intimacy and is too scattered for a deep connection, but he loves her anyways. She is his partner in business and - as far as he is concerned - life as well. He also - at one time - had a second intimate lover on the side who fell into a deep sleep and passed away.
* Next one had a tumultuous physical relationship with a woman when he was young, but fell out of love with her in favor of another. (She wanted exclusivity... but he wanted to be with woman #2 more.) He dumped the first woman (who later died of the sleeping disease) and has been in a relationship with the second woman ever since.
* Next one has had one and only one, and loves him and shares her life with him. They're looking for a second girl to join them, as she is bisexual and he enjoys having two girlfriends. (My character is his third relationship.)
* Next one is celibate. He is interested in a couple of women but they don't seem interested back.
* Next one has been with one and only one, though he has unrequited feelings for another. His longtime (sleepy) girlfriend requires faithfulness and he has remained physically faithful (for the most part) but emotionally is a different story.
* Next one has been with one and only one and loves her with his everything. She's his world.
* Last character has had a few hookups, but he's a wanderer and doesn't want anything permanent. And that's never really been an issue. He's emotionally unavailable in any case, so it's for the best.

SekoETC wrote:If something doesn't work out, it's very difficult to admit it and instead you end up ignoring your mate until one of you has a heart attack or starves to death, and then the surviving party hooks up with someone new.

You know, to be honest... and this might be the most cynical thing I've ever said... I'm not sure it's really all that different in real life.

I don't feel that way about my spouse, but I've seen it in enough marriages IRL.

Also, in Cantr I feel like people do break up? I know of several I can think of off-hand in the last two decades of Cantr time, some quite spectacular, some mundane.

Currently have one polyamorous char in steady relationships with two people. One monogamous char. And one who's never had a sexual thought - not sure how he'd react if anyone came onto him.

This list is out of all of my characters, living and dead.

• This one had a girlfriend, and they were going to get married, but real life got in the way for me and he ended up sleeping a lot, and he would be jealous whenever she hung out too much with other men. She eventually dumped him, and he couldn't really look at her for a while, but he always loved her. He ended up burying her, far from home. He died some years later. They were never sexually intimate but he would have taken her if she had expressed interest in it. He had passing interest in one or two other women in the town, but he was a monogamist and so he focused his sights on the one.
• I'm actually really surprised this one died a virgin. She had a boyfriend/fiance early in her spawnhood. The player then decided to kill off the character because of RL reasons, and the character expressed wishes of suicide but my character was selfish and wouldn't let him go through with it (starvation). Eventually he agreed to keep living and they started travelling (they were on an extended resource run). Then Cantr went down for like 3 months, and when it came back the player didn't come back, so my character ended up killing him because he was being mauled to death by animals anyway. It completely broke her, and she never really loved anyone ever again, other than a certain character who she knew would never think of her that way.
• This one has had mild interest in a select few people, but never really cared enough to act on it.
• This one grew up surrounded by men. How she remained single and celibate the whole time I'm not really sure.
• This one almost had a relationship, but then she decided to leave and he wouldn't come with her. She was attracted to all of the men in their party but it wouldn't have worked out with any of them.
• This one loved a girl since the day he met her. He loved her from the beginning and even when she underwent a major personality change. He never laid a hand on her unless he knew for sure she was okay with it. It never turned intimate; I don't think he even once kissed her. Then she died. It's unlikely he'll ever find another woman he loves as much as he loved her.
• This one experienced romantic attraction once, but she didn't really understand it, and it didn't go anywhere because he was killed for impersonating someone on the radio. lol
• This one was almost seduced by the local feral girl before someone else told him off and he regained his professionalism.
• This one is more of a cookie cutter blank slate nice character, who isn't interested in relationships, only in travelling with her travevlling companion. This is unlikely to change.
• This is the only one of my characters to ever have sex (it was a fade to black). Now she's jaded to the whole idea of romance because he decided to up and die and she never quite got over that.
• I'm kind of surprised this one was a virgin because she was once dragged/led around blindfolded by this one guy. Romance disgusted her.
• This one was hit on a bit, but he was a failspawn and so I let him die before anyone could push it forward.
• This one was a deeply disturbed character who, after being robbed of her love interest and her town and everyone she knew, finally robbed herself of life.
• This one is too busy hunting and being crazy to notice men. Or women. I'm really not sure what her sexual orientation is, but it's probably aromantic pandemisexual. It's not really important though, since it's never happened, and I doubt it will ever happen. Which is fine by both of us.
• This one has no interest whatsoever in a romantic relationship and would probaby turn down anyone that asked.
• This one is too young for me to tell just yet.

So all in all my characters have/are (does not add up):
2 engagements
2 breakups (1 got back together)
4 established couples broken apart by death
0 marriages/long-lasting domestic partnerships
1 sexual encounter
9 distinctly aromantic

Of my living characters:

• Had two crushes, but never got romantic - basically gave up out of shyness
• Was in love, but crazy circumstances lead to that breaking up and she /still/ hasn't recovered... I'm not sure she'll ever be in a relationship again. She doesn't even like interacting with people much non-romantically, terrified she'll screw things up.
• In a pretty stable relationship... working alongside him and loving every moment. Though she's less demonstrative than most couples seem to be, she /does/ get jealous. (which I just found out, on a trip they took)
• In a quite stable though rather odd relationship... as far as I can tell, most of the 'courtship' consisted of sparring. That said, it would take really bizarre events to lead to the breakup of this couple.
• Just became someone's girlfriend, though she's a bit awkward and not sure what to do, she is fond of him. Not sure how this one'll develop.
• Has a strong crush on a boy... who unfortunately had a boyfriend. Not at all sure what's going to happen now due to recent events.
• Nothing romantic-related happening to them x4
• Not in a relationship but possibly would be interested... if the right guy came along x2
• Too sleepy to be romantic... probably sleeping to death without a chance to find out
• Not interested at all, probably disappointing at least one person. Hasn't actually said so out loud though.

- Has a thing for rice.
- Had a short liason once.
- Had a girlfriend once. Has never been quite the same after she died.
- Has a long relationship. Been going for 30 - 40 years.
- 5 one night relationships, 3 engagements, 2 sexual liasons.

- looking for real love, but don't know she'll ever be able to love again after she got badly betrayed by her former man. Many one night stands though.. even longer lasting ones.
- tried two relationships and failed terribly, not understanding them one bit. even was engaged.. *sigh* now staying single!
- Married! (but never had sex .. So in love though..)
- Long lasting sleepy relationship.
- Long lasting relationship, did even some experimenting with another couple..
- Left her first man, fell madly in love soon after and they got married within the year..
- Loved someone once, but he fell asleep before anything could happen. Don't think she'd have any idea what to do, too uncomfortable with her own body.
- Has a sort of boyfriend and they kissed a few times, but not really focused on him.
- Flirts with every man around and takes whatever he can get his hands on..
- Has no idea about romantic notions, never even noticed anyone in a relationship.
- In an experimenting phase with a girl.
- Long lasting relationship, turning darker over time.. She's his mistress now

Living characters:

-is currently in a long-standing marriage to a woman who he doesn't have the depth to satisfy emotionally (or perhaps she suffers from chronic depression and her needs are in fact abnormal or unsatisfyable, and my character isn't deficient in any way - we honestly don't know). He knows, deep down, everything will end badly, because he knows that he can't provide for her needs, but he keeps trying over and over and over, because life without her is simply unfathomable. Even if he stared the futility in the face and recognized it, leaving her would result in her death, and that is not something he could live with. Eventually, the ship will sink. The only question is how much longer he can postpone it, and whether he'll go down with it or wash up on shore. Before that he was in a marriage to a woman that he gelled with effortlessly. She was the town drama queen and, on her 3rd or 4th declared suicide attempt, got sick of it and went with her to make sure she actually went through with it. His fall for her was swift and hard, especially for a man that swore never to love anyone. She just went into their home one day and died without a word.

-The relationship exploits of my other character are too complicated to even attempt to narrate.

I have some character relationships with 'till death do us part vibes', but that's really because they genuinely love each other and wouldn't be with anyone else, or die for that matter. Even in my most inactive periods, I've come online just to wake the lovers up.

Here's some of the statuses of my most important characters.

-This lass has never had any luck with love. Her first boyfriend died soon after he slept with her, leading her to believe he just got what he wanted then f***ed off. She's had crushes, both minor and serious, but they've led to her having her heart broken, hopes crushed, or made her feel dirty. She's still looking for the right man to come her way, but she's weary behind her flirting and playful attitude.

-This poor guy has spent most of his life with one woman. But after the death of his best friend and their daughter, he started to drift away from her. He also has the sinking suspicion that she's in love with her own father. So a combination of all this has led him to close himself off to her and everyone else, so their relationship dissolved. They seem to have mutually agreed that it's over without needing to say anything. Finding love again seems impossible, but he won't throw the prospect away just yet.

-She's spent most of her life alone, and the few men that have gotten close enough to her, not even in a romantic fashion, slept till they died, leaving her alone and extremely vulnerable. She stumbled upon her love quite literally; he was dying, struggling to breathe, and she nursed him back to health even while she suffered self inflicted injuries. He had never let anyone look after him, and she'd allowed herself to feel things other than fear and anger for the first time in many years. But recently he has fallen asleep, like all the rest, leading her down the slippery slope to depression, fear and madness.

-He spent the first few years of his life alone and out of place in his town until he found his love in the most surprising place. Both feeling the exact same way, they found a reason to live in each other, and they'll spend the rest of their lives as such.

-He spawned in a miserable town of note, and he hated it with everything he had. But in that horrible place he found his love, or at least he thought he did. But she showed very little interest in him after their first real long conversation, and though he expressed his feelings for her many a time, she'd act like he'd said nothing. It became too much, and he left without much of a word. A year or so later, she found him again, professing her love for him. He couldn't have been happier, but she promptly fell asleep after, only ever waking up when he spoke to another woman. Time passed, and his anger and patience wittled down to nothing. He left her, ironically for the woman he'd been speaking to that seemed to be the key to waking her, and they've been together ever since. His first love took off, he doesn't know or care where she went. His current love requires some waiting for, but he's used to it, and he knows it's for good enough reasons. He'd wait 100 years if it meant he could make her happy.

I have some new refreshing relationships starting off, I'll post them here later when I've seen them around for longer, but they are quite promising, no doom and gloom

Let me give this a go. I'll just do a few.

My eldest character fell in love with a man the day she spawned and they've been together all their life. They had plans to someday marry and travel but as time went on, that dream became more and more unlikely as friends and family began to die or just up and leave. As the deaths continued, her lover fell into a depression that she and no one else could get him out of. They tried to rekindle their flame but it had long since gone out. Realizing this, the pair have decided to end their 2 cantr-decade long relationship.

My second eldest spawned in a rather strict town. There she took interest in a knight in training. He was kind but seemingly oblivious to her advances, the town leader's wife did not approve but she continued anyway. She eventually learned that the man was not as ignorant as she thought and that he had a dark side. He told her he hated the knighthood and wanted out. It frightened her somewhat, but she decided to try and they planned to leave. The day they were to leave he did a 180 and told her he was staying after speaking with the leader's wife. She ended up leaving on her own.
In the next town over she met a guy who was 10 years older. He was the one who introduced her to sex, however the relationship did not turn out to be what she had hoped. He cheated on her with another. After that she kept herself away from relationships and love until she grew an interest in women. Her first girlfriend had issues with expressing emotion but she didn't mind teaching her until she fell asleep for a long time. It was during that time that she met another older man. Unlike the last two, this one was caring and treated her well. Unfortunately he went to sleep and never woke up. She had been banned from the town and was told that he'd passed when she returned. She has not been in any serious relationships since then.

My second male character was quiet and kept to himself for many years until he met a girl that thought him to not work so much and to open up. They had some bumps in the road but he loved her dearly, they were engaged. Unfortunately he too was cheated on and now resides in his room, eternally sulking with the door locked. He only comes out now to get food.

I have one who waited most of her life for a man that she met when she spawned. After nearly ten years he finally came to see her. He taught her about sex and they made love before he went back home. Things seemed to have been going well until she was told on the radio that she manipulated him into sex and he tried to kill himself because of it. Now she fears for her life and stays quiet when she is out.

And lastly, I've had one character that was in a polygamous relationship. She wanted someone to herself but was convinced to try it out. It was going good for a while until she found herself more attached to the guy. While on a sailing trip he fell ill and died. The other woman blamed her for it. They two seemed to have worked it out and tried to stay together but she ended up taking her own life. Now my character is alone. She probably won't fall in love again.

wow. see this is why i love this game. so much freedom and life. LOVE CANTR. cantr 2 is love, cantr 2 is life.

Might as well..

[*]This one was in love with a man for years before she ever told him. She was injured at the time when she told him, so he wanted to wait until she was better to talk about it. After they finally did he told her he loved her too. They got really close, then he grew more and more tired. He didn't wake up much but when he did she was just happy to be with him. They're still together, though she's feeling incredibly hurt.

[*]She quickly fell in love with a man in town. Though he fell victim to the sleeping sickness. While he was sleeping she became close with another who she eventually pushed away because her true love woke up. After a few years, her love died suddenly of a heart attack. Damn near broke her spirit but she soon realized she could love another. They were together for a few years but he ultimately slept so much that she couldn't take it after losing her first love to the sickness in the end so she broke it off. She's in love with another, who is actually wakeful, though she's hiding it.

[*]*sighs* This one.. she fell in love with the captain of the guard in her town. But after an event the two of them left. He kept telling her that he didn't love her, but she held onto hope. They met up with a ship captain, she felt drawn to him after some time. Her commander eventually ended up leaving her, she lost it. Her heart was put back together by another, though he soon hurt her as well by believing others over her. Reeling after that she grew close with another man on their ship, and left the crew with him to build their own ship. They're now married and so incredibly in love and devoted to each other.

[*]She fell in love with a man who worked too much. The silent brooding type. After arriving in a new town, she soon found herself falling in love with a woman. After a few nights, she cheated sadly and eventually broke things off with her fiancee to be with the woman. Things went down in town and they were both kicked out. Now traveling together they have said vows to each other and currantely are happy together as wife and wife.

[*]Fell in love with a traveler through her spawntown. Left with him and became his sale partner, traveling the island selling their towns resources. He eventually slept so much that she slipped into a depression. She left him eventually and went halfway across the island to a new home with the intention of being with a man she had met on the trip with her first love. She got sidetracked by how horrible she was feeling that she had a mental break down in the mountains where a man there helped her and comforted her. He was also going to the town she was. Eventually she went ahead of him because she was so anxious. Things didn't work between the man she went there for originally, but when the other gentleman from the road showed up, they grew close. Hopelessly in love with him he's given her a bright outlook on life that she didn't originally have.


[*]The others I have are still too young to really have much of a relationship status. A few have significant others, but they're still too new.

None of my characters do relationships. I feel like business relations and vague colleague-like interactions tend to evolve into something much more complex than the generic lovers' roleplay I was used to before.

I'm in the same boat. No relationships here. Too many bad experiences with irc games and the old telnet muds from the early 90's. Some people are just plain nuts and cant leave it at the computer. I'd prefer not to get into that. Not to mentioin my wife would probably kick my @ss if she caught me even cyber kissing someone lmao.

At the moment, my eleven characters are, from oldest to youngest -

1. Single, has had a few relationships in his long life but his last girlfriend sailed out to sea on a raft and starved herself. Not really looking for a new relationship at the moment.

2. Single, was once happily married but his wife fell ill and passed away several years ago. Not currently looking for a relationship.

3. Sort of engaged to his boyfriend, he has had few relationships in his long life, more out of choice than anything.

4. In a happy relationship with a woman much younger than he is, which isn't a problem for either of them.

5. In a happy relationship that has lasted for many years with his girlfriend, who is from the same town but they met elsewhere and sailed to new islands and settled down.

6. In a happy marriage with her wife,, who she has been with for many years.

7. Single and has never been in a relationship, but hasn't really been that interested in finding a partner.

8. Was once in a happy relationship until his girlfriend died, not currently looking for a new partner.

9. Single, has never been in a relationship and is happy with being single.

10. Single, but is trying to pluck up the courage to tell her crush that he is attracted to her.

11. Single and not currently looking.