Things that annoy or puzzle you about Cantr

[Snowdrop]

Sorry for double posting but I just started wondering, are you allowed to use the term Freudian slip in Cantr? Since technically there was no Freud so there was nobody to name the term, yet there's no other way to say it. Or can anyone think of any?

Could just call it a mind slip?

[SekoETC]

That's a good point. That might work.

[Snowdrop]

Oh, or 'slip of the tongue' is another one.

[altoids]

I still don't know how so many characters know which day it is. None of my characters have seen a calendar or any other way of tracking the time. They've got some notes that claim to have been written on day 3750 or whatever, but they don't even know if that's true.

[Armulus Satchula]

I still don't know how so many characters know which day it is. None of my characters have seen a calendar or any other way of tracking the time. They've got some notes that claim to have been written on day 3750 or whatever, but they don't even know if that's true.

I'm personally okay with it, but what really annoys me is when people post character logs that is just the copy and paste of the page.

[Armulus Satchula]

From Anony

When people expose others to their BDSM play. It's unethical to expose unwilling participants to your scenes, even non-sexual, no matter if they're 24/7 total power exchange or just collaring ceremonies. It's not about judgement, it's about not making other people feel they're forced to being part of your kink.

[SekoETC]

I guess that was aimed at me?

[sherman]

A bit weird way to say things. I think this is more a thing about people having different moral standards or something

[SekoETC]

It's probably the same kind of people who think people shouldn't rp rape because if some outsider eventually finds out about it, they can be offended. Imagine if things worked like that in real life. Someone confides to their friend that they were raped and they go "How dare you tell me this? I'm so offended. You probably did something to deserve that so you should've just kept quiet." instead of "I'm sorry to hear that, is there anything I can do to help you feel better?"

[ObsessedWithCats]

Personally I'm uncomfortable with people RP-ing non-jokesy flirting in public, but I suspect that's just me and I accept that it's a thing I have to deal with or find an excuse for my character to leave. I don't think non-sexual BDSM stuff is really all that different - in either case it could be whispered or done inside if the audience's 'involvement' isn't a part of it, and in both cases the participants make the choice to 'let' the people around watch and listen.

[SekoETC]

Once many years back, one of my characters dared his girlfriend into standing on top of a rock in the middle of a town, naked, and not being allowed to explain to anybody why she was doing it. As far as I recall, everybody just ignored it, but the two of us had a fun experience. I'm not sure if things have changed, if something like that would be considered inappropriate. After all, people do spawn naked and some never bother to get clothes.

And some characters wear collars in public, some even with the "owner's" name written on it, and nobody bats an eye. I guess it's only if you draw attention to it by actually putting it on them in public, then it might cross a line for some people.

[Vega]

People wears collars in public, not just in cantr but IRL also. I hve a friend that uses to wear a... Gag? As a pendant. I've never seen anyone annoyed because of that.

[Money]

When people expose others to their BDSM play. It's unethical to expose unwilling participants to your scenes, even non-sexual, no matter if they're 24/7 total power exchange or just collaring ceremonies. It's not about judgement, it's about not making other people feel they're forced to being part of your kink.

I read this as a criticism from within the BDSM community about public BDSM play on Cantr and I don't think this was as an attempt to impose their cultural/moral sensibilities on others. From what I understand BDSM has a pretty intense culture/community and they have set their standards pretty high so that the public's attitude towards them doesn't deteriorate further and no participants are involuntarily hurt during any BDSM play. Contrast this community and their standards with the stuff that goes on in Cantr and you could have some things which would be pretty serious violations of responsible RL BDSM culture occur routinely.

[SekoETC]

It might be that people don't for example assign a safeword because they know that if things get too tough, they can say "OOC Let's tone this down or fade to black." Even if the character was gagged or unconscious.

Also because things are played through characters, people often do things that they wouldn't dream of doing in real life, things that would actually hurt rather than be arousing. Some people also rp things that are physically impossible, such as things entering the uterus during intercourse.

[ObsessedWithCats]

I didn't particularly think about which side it might have been coming from either way, and I think my point still stands. Our characters are not part of these communities and shouldn't be expected to follow these rules or standards unless they come up with them in-game or it becomes an extension of the NCS rule. I suppose the point where this needs to be applied is where the character is created, in whether the player feels they should make that responsibility in-line with the character's personality (or v.v.).

I see now where that argument is coming from in real life, though knowing some of the awful 'policing' that goes on in transgender communities I wouldn't say that by default a criticism from 'the inside' is by default more valid or valid at all and I don't have the context form an opinion on the situation pre application to the Cantr context.

As a sort-of-related aside, I do think there are situations where even when nothing sexual or 'traditionally' sexual is expected its a good idea to check that all other participants are adults and to take things behind close windows before carrying on. My characters are all and have all been as asexual they come but one had things planned that I would never have RPed with a non-adult player.