Funny or interesting IC quotes

General out-of-character discussion among players of Cantr II.

Moderators: Public Relations Department, Players Department, Players Department Trainee

User avatar
prometheus
Posts: 222
Joined: Tue Aug 11, 2015 11:16 pm

Re: Funny or interesting IC quotes

Postby prometheus » Thu Oct 29, 2015 11:47 pm

God, I'm missing EVERYTHING. Angelou, that woman...well, that player, really. I LOVE her emotes.
User avatar
iavatus
Posts: 264
Joined: Thu Jun 18, 2015 12:14 pm

Re: Funny or interesting IC quotes

Postby iavatus » Fri Oct 30, 2015 2:03 am

4850-7.31: We arrived at Stoned Knight Fleatown.

Avren gives a note titled -Hi!- to Slayde.

Lion says: "Lobsters and salutations *waves a hand about* We're here again."

Avren says: "*stares blankly* What's a 'lobster'?"
Avren says: "Wait. That wasn't passive aggressive enough. Should I try again?"
Avren says: "Eh...it's early."

Stone Knight Brayarb says: "I thought you all were told you're not welcome here."

Avren says: "*she stretches and glances over at the other voice* Oh, hello! Don't think we've ever met?"

Stone Knight Brayarb says: "Because you're not welcome here."

Lion says: "Far as I heard, nobody's welcome here. Not traders, not visitors, newspawns barely tolerated. *yawns, showing off his teeth, and looks sleepily at the fellow* Got a name, racoon? Me, I'm Lion. I pretend to have manners, both in and not in my home."

Lion says: "I also spend a disturbing amount of my time, knitting stuffed racoons *looks at him speculatively and shrugs* Always interesting to meet potential models."

Stone Knight Brayarb says: "Stone Knight Stone Knight Brayarb, not that Avren deserves to know it after ruining the life of an innocent now under our protection.."

Stone Knight Brayarb says: "You lot are especially unwelcome. Most people we don't emmediately answer with "get the fuck out, you good-as-heartless witch"."

Avren says: "*she grins* Well nice to meet you two. And that's a marvelous way to introduce oneself. I think I'll start trying it out, think I'll make lots of new friends. "

Lion says: "Oh really? Take it you mean Adilalalalalah? She of the tears."
Lion says: "*nods* Might want to ask Adrian about that. He was, well. Given the facts, and actually apologised for being wrong."

Stone Knight Brayarb says: "Alright, give me the facts then."

Lion says: "He's still a knight, so it was a little off as far as apologies go, but still."

Aubergine Parkinson leaves Aubergine P. the Fortune Teller, entering Stoned Knight Fleatown.

Avren says: "Yeah, Adrian a pretty okay dude, all things considered. Not... *looking around* ...sure where he gets that from, really, but I was honestly impressed. "

Stone Knight Brayarb says: "If you're not in the mood for either giving me the facts or taking a crossbow bolt to the spot where your heart should be, get your dwarf back in your vehicle and drive away."

Avren says: "*smiling and taking out her pen* See, that's solid gold. Thanks Stone Knight Brayarb. This is why I love this place so much. You can't get material like this so easily, anywhere else..."

Lion says: "You evidently don't know Aubergine. She goes where she wills. And watch your own temper, good sir. May not be as free with bolts as you, but I will feed you each one you fire, if you loose one for no reason. By my honour as a member of the Order of the Black Mouflon."
Lion says: "Or the Apple. We're still deciding."

Avren points at note "BREAKING NEWS: Olip West swept away by flood as Sadstorm Adilah drowns entire population in her tears 4822-4824".

Avren says: "Potato Knights. Or Sugar. Those are still contenders too. "

Stone Knight Brayarb efficiently hurts Avren using a crossbow.

Aubergine Parkinson enters Aubergine P. the Fortune Teller, coming from the central area of Stoned Knight Fleatown.

Stone Knight Brayarb says: "GET THE FUCK OUT."

Avren says: "And I do have it all in writing, but there's a lot of reading, and certain amounts of reading comprehension required. *giving him a speculative look* You sure you're up to it?"

Stone Knight Brayarb says: "GO AWAY"
Stone Knight Brayarb says: "DO'T COME BACK"
Stone Knight Brayarb says: "YOU ARE UNWANTED"

Lion says: "Coward. Fool. Moron. I will feed you your own bones, for this."

Stone Knight Brayarb says: "GO AWAY"

Avren says: "Oh my goodness I've just been shot. *clamping her hand to her arm* This is a terrible tragedy and I'm in extreme pain. *flops about dramatically*"

Stone Knight Brayarb says: "YOU ARE UNWELCOME"

Lion says: "Avren, are you okay? This fool is loud, and stupid."

Stone Knight Brayarb says: "GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY"

Avren slathers 412 grams of honey on the unimpressive ouchie.

Aubergine Parkinson says: "Ey. *wandering groggily, uncertainly, attempts to seize his attention with a slender cane* Ey, ey, you buy fishin ring? Is a... wossname? Magic. Real dwarf magic. Big fish. *puts her hands apart as if to show how wide----But then: when crossbow fired, she jumps into the van*"

Stone Knight Brayarb quietly utters: "GO AWAYGO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY" and so on.


Lion says: "*points portentously at the hopping Racoon fool* I pronounce you, stupidhead. I deem you, silly. I curse you, with perpetual braindeadness."


Stone Knight Brayarb wolfishly growls: "GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY" for awhile.


Lion says: "*listens to the flood with his hands over his ears* And now I deem you, lungless."


Stone Knight Brayarb grandly gestures and proclaims: "GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY" and then twelve times more, to complete the curse with a wicked thirteen.


Avren says: "Yeah I guess I'm fine. *stares at the man and seems to be struggling to hold back a laugh* This is absolutely worth it, honestly."


Stone Knight Brayarb strongly murmurs: "GET THE FUCK OUT. GET THE FUCK OUTGET THE FUCK OUT GET THE FUCK OUTGET THE FUCK OUT."
Stone Knight Brayarb piercingly keens: "GET THE FUCK OUT. GET THE FUCK OUTGET THE FUCK OUT GET THE FUCK OUTGET THE FUCK OUT."
Stone Knight Brayarb intones in a hollow voice: "GET THE FUCK OUT. GET THE FUCK OUTGET THE FUCK OUT GET THE FUCK OUTGET THE FUCK OUT."
Stone Knight Brayarb grumpily elucidates: "GET THE FUCK OUT. GET THE FUCK OUT. GET THE FUCK OUT GET THE FUCK OUTGET THE FUCK OUT."
Stone Knight Brayarb queries confusedly: "GET THE FUCK OUT. GET THE FUCK OUT. GET THE FUCK OUT GET THE FUCK OUTGET THE FUCK OUT."
Stone Knight Brayarb curses uninspiringly: "GET THE FUCK OUT. GET THE FUCK OUT. GET THE FUCK OUT GET THE FUCK OUTGET THE FUCK OUT."


Lion says: "*gives him the finger* Eh. Stick it in your face, you dull little man."


Stone Knight Brayarb gets his crotch bitten by a wolf and yodels: "GET THE FUCK OUT. GET THE FUCK OUT. GET THE FUCK OUT GET THE FUCK OUTGET THE FUCK OUT.GET THE FUCK OUT. GET THE FUCK OUT. GET THE FUCK OUT GET THE FUCK OUTGET THE FUCK OUT.GET THE FUCK OUT. GET THE FUCK OUT. GET THE FUCK OUT GET THE FUCK OUTGET THE-- [[We now interrupt this log due to technical difficulties, please stand by.]]

[[Beep.]]


[[[Brayarb feels very strongly that that Avren and Lion should leave, and elucidates on the subject for quite some time!]]


Lion says: "Crew *whistles, and points at him* This, is what we don't do. Be loud, and useless."


[[Brayarb's brain shorts out in his skull and smoke pours from his ears, desperation in his eyes as he finds his mouth can only repeatedly stutter out the last four commands he gave it.]]


Avren says: "Oh my gosh I think his brain broke. This is so good!"

[[["GET THE FUCK OUT GET THE FUUUUCK OUT GET THE FUCK OUT!" Stone Knight Brayarb joyfully sings, while a line of wolves begin cancan dancing behind him.]]

Stone Knight Brayarb says: "v"

[[Stone Knight Brayarb whips out a raccoon hand puppet and has it wave its little arms and squeak "GET THE FUCK OUT!" in an adorable fashion, but the show is a long one and the audience becomes restless.


Lion talks to Stone Knight Brayarb, asking him if they only taught four words in ventriloquist school.


Stone Knight Brayarb grumbles that everyone's a critic and moves to put the puppet away, but lo! The creature holds fast, with glowing red eyes and fathomless maw spewing forth "GET THE FUCK OUT. GET THE FUCK OUT. GET THE FUCK OUT,", more times than mortal ears can comprehend.


Salara says: "Seriously. Please just leave. *she sighs wearily, rubbing her brow*"


Stone Knight Brayarb bares his teeth and bites down hard, ripping the offending puppet away with a snarl, spitting flesh and fur as he howls at the sky, "GET THE FUCK OUT!" in tones as clear as bell, and in that moment 297 angels got their wings.


Avren says: "*collapses against the steering wheel with laughter*"


Stone Knight Brayarb efficiently hurts Lion using a crossbow.

Lion takes some fresh dung.
Lion gives some fresh dung to Stone Knight Brayarb.

Lion says: "*carefully places some dung in racoons hands* Here. Rub on your face, might make you smarter."

Lion says: "*ducks the bolt* And that's two."
Lion says: "Scar, retrain, restrain your fool. There will be redress, in goods and works of charity, that your little group must do as penance."

Salara says: "Just go. Please. "

Avren says: "Slayde, ahahahaha, oh my goodness... *gasps for breath* Lion, you all right? *sees he's uninjured and starts cracking up again* That was, fucking amazing. This place is the gift that just keeps on giving."
Avren says: "Seriously I think his brain broke."

Aubergine Parkinson says: "*marches back and forth in the van in a panic only cured by liberal drinks of brandy*"

Stone Knight Brayarb says: "Go away"

Lion says: "Eh. I can only hear the same words so many times, before I ignore everything you state. From now on."

Avren says: "*looking at him curiously* ...go away go away go away go away, don't you mean? Times 1000? With some 'fucks' liberally sprinkled in there?"

Lion says: "So, attempted murder. Assault. Lies. Fucking trying to kill my damn ears."

Stone Knight Brayarb says: "I don't want to waste creativity on you"

Avren says: "The last one was the worst, but also the most hilarious. "

Lion says: "I'd say that comes to, 20 years of penance."

Avren says: "But yeah, shooting people with crossbows is bad too."

Lion says: "In clothing designed by myself."
Lion says: "I do hope you like sackcloth."

Stone Knight Brayarb says: "How do I get rid of you people?"

Lion says: "Shit, yelling didn't work? Maybe your heritage as a stone knight is in question?"
Lion says: "QUick, call the ancestors, the ones that might have done anything. Maybe they'll have some tips."
Lion says: "Sorry you got first aimed at, my friend. But you know, that's what you get for being, I don't know. Female?"

Avren says: "*continues writing furiously* Augh, my wrist is gonna fall off before I even get halfway through the 'get the fuck outs' at this rate..."

Lion says: "So, Salara. *he looks to her, sober in aspect for once* How will you redress this ill, your pet has caused?"

Avren says: "Yeah I know, getting shot sucks. Thankfully his mouth isn't the only weapon he's not very skilled with."

Avren says: "My eardrums sure are bleeding, though, and don't think honey will fix it. *winces*"

Salara says: "I will ask you to leave. And he's not my pet. He's my brother. We've asked you repeatedly to leave and not come back but yet you do if only to for.end us."

Salara says: "To torment us. *she sighs and rubs her brow*"

Avren says: "*gives her a sympathetic look* Sorry, your ears still ringing too? Yeah I know hearing yourself speak must be difficult after all that. "

Aubergine Parkinson points at note "Anika".

Stone Knight Brayarb says: "Leave, disappear, flee, fly, go, move, quit, retire, take off, withdraw, abscond, decamp, defect, desert, ditch, elope, embark, emigrate, exit, flit, forsake, issue, migrate, part, relinquish, sally, scram, split, vacate, vamoose, vanish, beat it, break away, clear out, cut out, go away, go forth, head out, move out, pull out."

Avren says: "Kind of funny your bro there decided to inflict that pain on you, too."

Lion says: "Here's synonyms for you, mr I just ate a thesaurus."

Avren says: "We were actually just passing through on business. And it was requested we stop here, last time. "
Avren enters Stoned Knight Fleatown, where she sees five wolfbitten people with mange.

Lion says: "Fool. Idiot. Incompetent. Dumb. Stupid. Moronic. Funny looking. *shrugs* What, he is."

Avren enters Aubergine P. the Fortune Teller, where I see 4 people, leaving the central area of Stoned Knight Fleatown.

Stone Knight Brayarb talks to Lion, asking him what a 'thesaurus' is in a passive aggressive manner.

Salara says: "*she shakes her head* Just go. And who requested you stop."

Avren says: "*tugs briefly on Slayde's arm* Dang, he's heavy. Guess we will just have to wait. *searches around for cotton wadding to stuff her ears with*"

Lion says: "So, your answer is none, to do nothing at all? Fine. That's an answer."

Salara says: "*she frowns* Why are you trying to move Slayde?"

Lion says: "As one knight to another, I formally request the transfer of custody of your pet, who looks like a raccoon, and goes by Bray or something."

Lion says: "Do you deny this lawful and completely legitimate request?"

Salara says: "No. You do jot get him. Now answer me. *she looks at Avren* Why are you trying to move Slayde?"

Avren says: "Eh, this probably counts as perfectly normal behavior for all of them, honestly. Been living all alone in the woods too long, maybe."

Lion says: "*nods* Good. I didn't want to feed the fool anyway, nor anything. Just wanted you to get the same feeling, everytime a stone knight throws their weight around in a town that's not theirs."

Aubergine Parkinson take a copy of a note.
Aubergine Parkinson drops a note.
Note is pulled from Aubergine P. the Fortune Teller to Stoned Knight Fleatown.

Salara says: "This is our town you fool."

Lion says: "Well, duh. That's what I meant."

Avren says: "Don't mess with the Potato Knights, you'll regret it, and so on."
Avren says: "Doesn't matter what town. As a knight, I just get to repeat that everywhere I go."

Lion says: "I've heard your people, insist on every respect paid, far from their home. That, is what that was an example of."

Aubergine Parkinson drops a note.

Stone Knight Brayarb says: "If you take me, will you go away and leave my sister and her friends alone?"

Salara says: "*she shakes her head and turns to Stone Knight Brayarb* "

Lion says: "But here, it's us, as non-violent, possibly annoying people, travelling through your ah, town, thinking that we can be accorded the basic rights of not getting shot by some racoon wannabe."

Salara talks to Stone Knight Brayarb, asking him to remove a tick on her back that she just can't quite reach.
Aubergine Parkinson points at note "Stone Knight Barbara, 4851".

Stone Knight Brayarb talks to Salara, reminding her she hasn't yet taken her worm pill today either.

Avren says: "But I still don't attack people, or holler myself into a brain aneurysm at the drop of a hat. Guess I still need forty years of training or so. *shrugs* "

Salara talks to Stone Knight Brayarb, and an argument about natural cures vs medication ensues.

Lion says: "We don't want a hair of you, you clown. We want redress, for your actions."

Stone Knight Brayarb talks to Salara, expressing skepticism about whether 'hunker down and scoot' can really be considered a cure.
Salara talks to Stone Knight Brayarb, flying into a rage at his disagreement and demanding he perform prostrate exams on all the wolves by way of apology.

Lion says: "Oh, how's Adilalallalalh? The one your protecting, or kidnapping?"

Stone Knight Brayarb says: "If I appologize will you go away?"

Avren says: "Yeah, dude, seriously, why would we want you in our van. Gross."

Aubergine Parkinson drops a note.
Note is pulled from Aubergine P. the Fortune Teller to Stoned Knight Fleatown.

Stone Knight Brayarb talks to Salara, tearfully begging her forgiveness, though the first gleam of rebellion can be seen shining in his eye like a star before the dawn as he gloomily approaches the pack.

Lion says: "Apologise? Wow. That's a turn around. Apology, would be the cherry on top, even if not sincere."

Avren says: "We're waiting on Slayde to wake up. Apologizing might mean we refrain from making fun of you guys on the radio later, though."

Avren says: "Though I can't make any promises in regards to bookcases in Klojt."

Lion says: "Apologise, publicly, in several towns? That's a start."

Salara says: "Why are you waiting on my boyfriend.."

Aubergine Parkinson says: "Booze. *she chimes in*"

Stone Knight Brayarb says: "Just tell me how to get rid of you and I"
Stone Knight Brayarb says: "'ll do whatever."

Aubergine Parkinson says: "*holds out a greedy hand*"

Lion says: "Apologise, with works done for charitable organisation *nods to Aubergine* including keeping our lush tanked up, another good step."

Lion says: "Actually being a person, not a knight, and admitting fault in words, deeds and wealth, would be a start. Here and now? *shrugs* You've thrown so many bloody words about already today. Some more will fall flat."

Lion says: "They must be public, and acknowledged by people known."

Salara says: "All of you. Shut up. *she finally yells and then points to Avren* You. Why are you trying to move Slayde and wait for him? "

Avren says: "Oh, Slayde's your boyfriend? *looks from one to the other with a raised brow* Huh."
Avren says: "Anyway, since you asked -so- politely, Slayde wants a ride to Blojt. He requested we give him one. "

Salara says: "*her brows furrow and she turns to Slayde* "

Salara talks to Slayde, indulging in the traditional bumsniffing greeting once she notices he's too soundly asleep to protest.
Aubergine Parkinson talks to Aubergine Parkinson about whether putting window glass in the gas tank would be less or more funny than sushi.

Avren says: "I mean, I assumed he was coming right back afterwards, but...eh, I dunno. Wouldn't blame the guy for wanting to give his eardrums a chance to heal, after this whole scene."

Avren says: "*staring at Bray in fascination* And I still don't even know what that was. Did...did his brain start spazzing out inside his skull? Will it happen again?"

Aubergine Parkinson takes a note.
Aubergine Parkinson drops a note, a note.

Avren says: "And 'v'. What did 'v' mean, in the middle of all that? *mystified expression*"

Avren points at note "Stone Knight Barbara, 4851".
Avren points at note "WELCOME TO OPPIRASH FOREST, 4851".

Stone Knight Brayarb says: "My teeth got caught on my bottom lip in a bit of exhaustion, if you must know"

Avren says: "*she snorts* Good, but needs to be written about 5000 more times, and frankly I'm not sure if there's enough room on the page."

Stone Knight Brayarb says: "I was just trying to get rid of you with all of my heart, soul, and body. That's your explaination."
Stone Knight Brayarb says: "If I had known it wouldn't work, I wouldn't have bothered waking up."

Lion says: "Oh, poor baby. I'm sorry to disappoint."

Avren says: "*raises a hand* I would like 412 grams of honey, or it's equivalent, in compensation. As the opening move in this whole apology thing."

Stone Knight Brayarb says: "Just promise me you'll leave after. I'll give you the honey, fuel, and appology on the radio admitting I'm an idiot if you'll go away."

Avren says: "We still promised Slayde we'd give him a ride, though."

Stone Knight Brayarb says: "Then I'll wait for Slayde. No point in doing anything until then."

Lion says: "Um, I didn't say anything about radio. I quite clearly stated, that a radio apology is not an apology."

Lion says: "Now, you have choices of how to deliver it, but start with the goods. And fuck it, throw our benefactor some booze, you cheap sod."

Lion says: "She smells sober. You don't want a sober Aubergine."

Stone Knight Brayarb says: "*ignores them until furher notice*"

Avren says: "*ignores him ignoring them, until some unspecified date in the future*"

Lion says: "*gets confused by the stilted atmosphere, but continues to act as normal*"

Lion says: "Slayde know he's your, what was it, boyfriend? Or is this a surprise to him as well? Like your crying whatever lady's safety behind a closed window, seems to be a surprise to her."
Lion says: "*muttering mostly to himself* Though almost anything is a surprise to her, through those weeping puffy eyes."

Lion drops a note.
Lion points at note "Blahblah pig wolf stone knight" held by Lion.

Avren says: "*writes to the very bottom edge of the page and then rubs her aching wrist, staring* I've...run out of space on the note. Still in the middle of the get the fuck outs. This, is a new record."

Avren says: "Think it'll be over twice as long as the Adilah one once I'm done. Not even counting the foreword, this time."

Avren says: "*she glances at the note Lion is holding and smirks* Oh sure. Take the easy way out."

Lion says: "Was rather repetitive. Repetitive. Repeti *smacks himself* Sorry."
Lion says: "He had me doing it."
Lion says: "I'm a shit artist. I paint in words and deeds."
Lion says: "Fine. *gets out a pencil and starts writing instead*"

Avren says: "Now now, your art is very nice. And the burden of the historical documenter, is one I've willingly taken upon myself."

Lion says: "Oh, I'm doing a fictionised version. *he nods happily* For starters, in mine, Blahblah is intelligible."
Lion says: "Sadly, there's no way to remove some of the trappings *gestures to the nude newspawns, the furry tails and ears with a mild shudder* without losing some of the inherent humour."

Lion says: "Oh, that does remind me."

Lion says: "How do you get so much wolf fur, without hunting wolves? Do you have a black market of smugglers from the outside, importing their pelts?"

Avren says: "*taps her pen on her chin and pulls out a fresh page with a sigh, glancing at the previous note with a frown* The worst part is that I've lost count, now. "
Avren says: "...it was somewhere before the 'v' that I ran out of space, that's all I can tell. *sighs and runs her finger down the line of FUCKS written upon the page, silently moving her lips*"

Lion says: "Eh. A historian's job is to tell history. NOt blow by blow, but event by event."
Lion says: "Does it matter, that his brain got stuck on fuck, and uttered it 200, 300, 400 or 2000 times precisely? No. Simple enough for him to be given the title of, Carrier of the Worlds Fucks."

Avren says: "True, true. It may not matter...but it's still so much funnier, when written out."
Avren says: "Besides, if I had to hear it, other people should have to read it. And suffer, as we have suffered."

Lion says: "Sharing the pain, is another part of the historian's job."


Image
User avatar
iavatus
Posts: 264
Joined: Thu Jun 18, 2015 12:14 pm

Re: Funny or interesting IC quotes

Postby iavatus » Fri Oct 30, 2015 4:41 am

Ignatius says: "So you need your tattoo touched up, Alex? *he looks it over with the air of a professional* Lucky for you, I, Ignatius Maximilian Fairmont, am good at everything."

Ignatius says: "Oh yes. I'm a very talented tattoo artist. *looks very important*"

Alex says: "*She looks at him a bit unsure.* Have you -ever-made a tattoo before?"

Ignatius says: "*a dismissive wave* Details. My genius won't be held back by such minor concerns."

Alex says: "Well, my trust will... You are wearing a dress."

Ignatius says: "*he looks incredibly offended* Excuse you? I'll have you know that my garb is very masculine and befitting a puissant warrior like myself. Are you oppressing me for my fashion choices?"

Ignatius says: "I fail to see what my clothing has to do with my ability to tattoo you. This is discrimination! How dare you!"

Alex says: "A dress is the most uncomfortable thing to wear for everything. I cannot imagine how anyone would choose it for anything but being a wedding or anything like that. Not at all a warrior... If your taste dressing is like that... "

Ignatius says: "*he stares at her with loathing in his eyes, his gaze more frigid than the blizzard raging outside* YOU are insulting MY fashion sense? Ha! Hahahahaha! *he laughs hysterically as if this is very funny* Honey, I hate to break it to you, but the angsty goth getup is very passe. And what's with the multicolored hair? Do you honestly think that's attractive?"

Ignatius says: "Your tattoos are tacky anyway. I won't lower myself to work on them. *he turns his back and ignores her, returning to his work*"

Alex says: "I don't dress to be attractive. Or goth whatever is that. I dress to be comfortable and be able to work without stupid skirts not letting me move or people complaining because I cut them too short... *She makes her voice sound huskier and threatening.* And you leave my hair alone... It's -not- multicolored, stupid... *She caresses the raven braid with some sort of devotion and messes her hair.*"

Ignatius says: "I'm sorry, did someone say something? I can't hear anything with all this wind."

Alex says: "Hey, how you make the soap?"

Ignatius says: "*ignores Alex*"

Alex says: "I've been trying to get some for quite a while..."

Alex says: "Hey, Avren, you know how to make the soap?"

Avren points at note "Ignatius Outfit Plans" in envelope held by you.

Avren says: "Eh, I gotta say, I didn't care for your necklace design. Just wasn't up to the level of the rest of the outfit. But we have some gold now, just ask Lion about trading for it when he wakes up. Don't think we have any silk left. *turning to Alex and shrugging helplessly* And I'm sorry, I'm not good at absolutely everything the way Igs is. Maybe you could ask about it on the radio, though. I know the University people brought some here as gifts back during Louisa's wedding. "

Ignatius says: "*he rolls his eyes at Alex* Okay. Fine. You take some bone ash, water, and meat. Grind it up and cook it over a fire. *he sneers* It'll improve your scent."

Ignatius says: "The soap I intend to make will be much nicer, but I think that'll do for you."

Avren says: "The soap they brought Louisa I think was clear, with rose petals inside, if I remember right. There may be a few different ways of making it."

Libby says: "That sounds about right, though I don't know how they made it."
Libby says: "I'm sure that Jasper has it now..."

Alex says: "And how are you going to make yours?"

Ignatius says: "*a superior expression* Trade secret."

Alex says: "*Rolls her eyes.* Sure..."

Avren efficiently kills a mouflon using a brand new claymore.
Avren efficiently kills a red-tailed hawk using a brand new claymore.
Avren efficiently kills a spotted hyena using a brand new claymore.

Ignatius says: "Also, Avren, your lack of taste is legendary, but I'll take your misguided input into consideration."

Avren says: "*stabs three helpless animals to death while looking directly at Iggy*"

Ignatius says: "Anyway, John. You're my one true bro in the world. What do you think of my plan to become a beautician? Regular people can't become as sexy as me no matter what, but I can certainly help them along. Soaps, creams, diet plans, clothes... People will pay for this shit, right?"

John Stone says: "Ah, that sounds like a marvelous idea indeed. Let us not forget combs, like Lady Avren's, too, and mirrors so that they might see how slightly more attractive they have become."

Ignatius says: "Dwarf, what do you think of my cunning plans for merchandise? *passes over a note to Aubergine*"

Avren says: "*yawning* So who is this Victor? Is he moving too? *pauses and gives Ignatius a suspicious stare*"

Ignatius says: "What, are you also interested in my entrepreneurship? *passes along another copy to Avren* Here, I think you'll be interested in all of these. *he lowers his voice to a conspiratorial stage whisper* Maybe if you weren't such a weird-looking freak, Lion would be interested in you!"

Ignatius says: "Anyway, Avren, I will give you all of these things if you give me a giant pile of stuff, so just say the word. *he gives her a pitying glance* You certainly need the help."

Avren says: "*nods at Olivia and takes another slurp of her own soup, saying in a pleasant, conversational tone* This is like, seriously my favorite food now. I want John to make a bigger batch but it uses a lot of milk...if we only had a more reliable source, I could fill up an entire bathtub of boiling hot soup and then drown Ignatius in it while he feebly flails with his weak girly wrists. "

Avren points at note "Ignatius Beauty Shop Plans".

Ignatius says: "John! *he points dramatically at John*"
You see Ignatius (a man in his twenties) pointing at John Stone.

Ignatius says: "What are you doing with your life now that you've coated your body in worm poo? If you need gainful employment, I'm willing to lower myself to accept your assistance."

Avren says: "*reads thoughtfully over the note* And these aren't bad ideas but you'd probably sell a lot more if most of the world's population didn't already look like twenty year olds with hourglass figures and shiny hair and flawless skin."

Ignatius says: "Well, Avren, they just don't quite realize yet how ugly they are. *a sinister smile*"
User avatar
Vega
Posts: 2191
Joined: Thu Feb 03, 2011 10:39 am
Location: Lejos. Far away.
Contact:

Re: Funny or interesting IC quotes

Postby Vega » Fri Oct 30, 2015 9:31 am

iavatus wrote:Ignatius says: "[...] Honey, I hate to break it to you, but [...]"


Ignatius called her Honey and she didn't complain? :shock:
Oh, my, she was sick xD
Quebec Lima Delta November
Something like a story
User avatar
Marian
Posts: 3190
Joined: Thu Dec 15, 2005 12:16 am

Re: Funny or interesting IC quotes

Postby Marian » Mon Nov 09, 2015 4:53 am

4869-5.13: Biin Hejj says: "Ack! To the sheep-mobile! *He bounds towards the bus*"

4869-5.13: You enter Jelly Banana, where you see 2 people, leaving the central area of Jakara.

4869-5.14: Biin Hejj says: "Let us vamoose, post haste!"

4869-5.14: You pet domesticated bighorn sheep.

4869-5.14: Biin Hejj says: "I shall call you Beeper. And you will be my friend. And I will hug you and squeeze you and pet you and water you and make you a nice hat and call you Beeper."

4869-5.15: Biin Hejj says: "*He takes a magnanimous bow, waving his arm in a flourish like a hitchhiking bald eagle in a windstorm.* A thousand thanks yous, good people of Jakara. Your gift will make Master Landis giddy as a schoolgirl discovering the wonders of sliced bread. You have our undying and unblemished gratitude."

4869-5.18: +Misha (Servant of Donii) says: "*he giggles at Biin*"

4869-5.23: You see domesticated bighorn sheep can't find anything to eat.

4869-5.23: You see domesticated bighorn sheep can't find anything to eat.

4869-5.23: You see domesticated bighorn sheep can't find anything to eat.

4869-5.23: You see domesticated bighorn sheep can't find anything to eat.

4869-5.29: Biin Hejj says: "Aw, bonkers! Who has possession of the generous basket of hay products and hay-like snacks for our slightly peckish passengers?"

4869-5.29: You enter Jakara, where you see 5 people, leaving Jelly Banana.

4869-5.29: You enter Jelly Banana, where you see 2 people, leaving the central area of Jakara.

4869-5.29: Biin Hejj says: "Okay. Roll call. Misha..."

4869-5.29: Biin Hejj points at +Misha (Servant of Donii).

4869-5.29: Biin Hejj says: "Ashley."

4869-5.29: Biin Hejj points at Ashley.

4869-5.29: Biin Hejj says: "Beeper."

4869-5.29: Biin Hejj points at domesticated bighorn sheep.

4869-5.29: Biin Hejj says: "Friend of Beeper Number One."

4869-5.29: Biin Hejj points at domesticated bighorn sheep.

4869-5.29: Biin Hejj says: "Ensemble."

4869-5.29: Biin Hejj points at domesticated bighorn sheep.

4869-5.29: Biin Hejj points at domesticated bighorn sheep.

4869-5.29: Biin Hejj points at domesticated bighorn sheep.

4869-5.30: Biin Hejj says: "Right! Wait a moment. *He counts his fingers.* Stop moving around! Beeper, keep an eye on your friends."

4869-5.30: Biin Hejj says: "*He peers at the bus* We need to move. Let me see. Ah. Internal combustion engine. Fuel gauge. Ah, yes...pistons move those levers and, thusly, locomotion! Shouldn't be too difficult."

4869-5.30: Biin Hejj says: "###GRINDING GEARS###"

4869-5.30: Biin Hejj says: "Ah! Blasted all!"

4869-5.30: Biin Hejj says: "Oh... *He peers again.* Clever...clever indeed. A clutch system and a... oh... stick to move between alternating... fascinating!"

4869-5.30: Biin Hejj says: "Piece of cake."

4869-5.30: Biin Hejj says: "###GRINDING GEARS###"

4869-5.30: Biin Hejj says: "Drat!"

4869-5.30: Biin Hejj says: "Seems more art than science. *He slides into the seat and firmly presses on the clutch* Ah ha! Of course! Silly me. "

4869-5.30: Biin Hejj says: "#grind# Easy now. #griiiiind# Hey... #gr...# That's more like it. *The bus slides forward gingerly.* Ah. So long, Jakara@"

4869-5.30: Biin Hejj points at expressway to Jakara Hills.

4869-5.30: Biin Hejj says: "###GRIND###"

4869-5.30: Biin Hejj says: "OH fart on a fiddle."

4869-5.31: You leave Jakara, using Jelly Banana, taking expressway to Jakara Hills.

4869-5.31: You arrived at Jakara Hills.

4869-5.31: Biin Hejj says: "Now THAT is what I call momentum! Ah, the mechanics. So elegant. "

4869-5.32: Biin Hejj says: "#gr...# *He eyes the stick shift menacingly* #gr...# Come one, you."

4869-5.32: Biin Hejj says: "#g....# *They slide forward, moving very quickly down the hill. Too quickly in fact. Biin sucks in his breath and grips the wheel.* Toomuchspeedtoomuchspeedtoo much SPEED! AK! WHERE IS THE BREAKING MECHANISM???"

4869-5.32: You leave Jakara Hills, using Jelly Banana, taking paved road to Zuzi Hills.

4869-5.33: Biin Hejj says: "*The bus wobbles at faster-than-recommended speeds, but despite the mild protestation of only one of the ensemble of bighorn sheep (not Friend of Beeper Number One) the bus manages to stay on the road by a very white-knuckled driver whose top hat bounces up and down with precarious motion.* fartfartfartfartfart... "

4869-5.33: Biin Hejj says: "*He glances sheepishly (no pun intended. Okay, maybe a little pun intended) at Misha and Ashley, trying to hide a controlled nervousness* Er. Um... This is flight 769 en route to Zuzi. Estimated time of arrival... *He looks at his bare wrist* Oh-Eight-Hundred hours. Please, fasten your safety harnesses, and remember this is a no smoking flight. Thank you for flying Jelly Banana Buslines! fartfartfar..."

4869-6.01: Ashley says: "We're moving! *she throws her arms up*"

4869-6.02: Biin Hejj says: "*He still grips the wheel, still white-knuckled* I'd have Beeper come around with drinks, but... Whoa! We have encountered a bit of turbulence! "



You hear from the radio: "#goofy spastic voice# Breaker-one-nine,this is Funky Chicken in the Jelly Banana with a boat load of hungry sheep. Comin' inhot and heavy to Zuzi. E.T.A. approximately ...Oh-Eight-Hundred, bare wrist time.We'll be needing about a gazillion CCs of hay. Stat! Come on back. #SQUELCH#""

4870-6.01: Biin says: "*He springs up, hat disheveled.* I'm up! I'm UP! *He slams his foot on the break despite the fact that the bus already is at a standstill, having glided just into town moments before.* Ah! Emergency! Four hungry bighorn sheeps! We must remove this quartet of ruminants post haste! *He jumps from his seat and grabs the horns of one of them* Beeper! Beeper! Don't fade on me now, man! Er... sheep! We. Will. ... GET you. Food. *Strikes a melodramatic pose before tugging on one of the rams.*"

4870-6.04: Biin says: "Ack! *He butt protrudes out the door while he continues to tug on the horns of a rather disinterested and unamused sheep.*"

4870-6.06: Una says: "No one has asked for a ferry ride. *she looks at Zhao glumly*"

4870-6.07: Una says: "*she gives an odd look to the man with his butt sticking out the bus*"

4870-6.07: Biin says: "Oh? Fairies? Um...they're rather small to be giving people rides. More akin to toadstools than trucks methinks. *He waves his arm and tries to give a bow while yanking on the very stubborn sheep.* Greetings and salutations, my good woman. Biin Hejj, at your--OW! *He flashes a glare at the sheep currently chomping on his coat sleeve.* Hey! Unhand me, scoundrel! This is my one and only best suit!"

4870-6.07: Una says: "*she gives another odd look to Biin before shaking her head and tugging at the sheep* Hi, I'm Una."

4870-6.08: Biin says: "Pleased *grunt* to *groan* make *gasp* your *merfle* acquaintance, Miss Una... *oof*"

4870-6.08: Biin says: "*He sticks a toe out towards Misha, barely missing his shoulder.* If ~someone~ with a certain ~wheeled barrow~ would ~wake up~...!"

4870-6.08: Una says: "Same here, Mr. Biin. *she ducks under his arm*"

4870-6.09: Biin says: "I've been absent for a span of time... Are you a visitor here in our fair city? I haven't had the pleasure of introducing myself to you before. What brings you to the land of the fortunate and the home of the HEY! Now unhand my hat, Beeper. *He yanks an absurdly tall stovepipe hat from the sheep's jaws and places it upside down on his head before he corrects himself.*"

4870-6.09: Biin says: "#over-dramatically strained voice# Ashley? A little help?"

4871-0.25: Biin says: "Methinks Beeper is shy."

4871-2.16: You see domesticated bighorn sheep being pulled to Zuzi, coming from Jelly Banana.

User avatar
iavatus
Posts: 264
Joined: Thu Jun 18, 2015 12:14 pm

Re: Funny or interesting IC quotes

Postby iavatus » Thu Nov 12, 2015 10:31 pm

Made of short, made of awesome

-----

Avren says to Aubergine Parkinson: "*looking her over* Hy Auby, you all right? Sorry if you were getting freaked out earlier with the crossbows and stuff...didn't, uh.../really/ didn't expect...whatever the fuck all that was that happened earlier. You know we wouldn't take you anywhere we thought would be dangerous."

Aubergine Parkinson says to Avren: "*scrunches up her features like a sour librarian* Ain't no magic cure thaaat kaindah stoopid. *mockingly stretches out the last three words, slooowly; eyes will roll and tongue will hang* They all dumb an poor."

Aubergine Parkinson points at Valor.
Aubergine Parkinson says: "*points excitedly* Ey, ey! You. Fishman. Buy fishing ring? *blurs a handful of copper trinkets, uncertain which is indicated as the grubby fist disrupts the air* Give you real big fish, bigger an Barbara's dumb teats. *finally sorts out the mess of copper trinkets, lifting up a single, invaluable and totally legitimate piece of magical merchandise*"

Aubergine Parkinson points at copper ring (Three opulent breasts are drooping from this ring.) held by Aubergine Parkinson.

Valor says: "*He remains silent for a few seconds*"
Valor says: "If you guys don't leave...."
Valor says: "*He smirks* Just kidding, I'm not the hostile type."
Valor says: "I don't want a ring though, thank you though."

Avren says: " A sense of humor, even? Wow, worst knight ever. *she grins* What's your name, man?"

Valor says: "My name is Valor, nice to meet all of you. I try to avoid confrontation most of the time."

Aubergine Parkinson says: "Ey, ey, Valerie, got a beard eh? Ye. Real man. Got a lady? *rummages through terrible things, all of them copper monstrosities meant to pass for jewellery, finally unearthing a bouquet half crushed under dwarf buttocks* Ye! You want? Real magic flowers, make you lady shut up."

Aubergine Parkinson points at an old rose bouquet (Fiery explosion of a red so vibrant, it perfectly complements the healthy green stems of the bouquet.) held by Aubergine Parkinson.

Valor says: "It's okay, I don't have a wife or girlfriend or anything like that. But thank you for the compliment. "

Avren says: "Valor, so I take it you're a newspawn? You appear to be more human than scar tissue still. "

Aubergine Parkinson says: "*unwilling to give up, lifts up a string of beads* Seduction string?"


----


Valor says: "I was just wondering, what are your names?"

Avren says: "Oh? Sorry, thought you knew. I'm Avren Banner, the, uh...what was it? *glancing questioningly at Bray* good-as-heartless witch?"

Avren points at Lion.
Avren says: "And this is Lion."
Avren says: "The wardrobe's in the back of the van."

Lion says: "*looks a little sad* I don't have any epithets attached to me just yet."
Lion says: "Earned em, ain't got it."
Lion says: "ANyway, did introduce ourselves, I understand if you couldn't hear anything around that blahblah patch of Blahblah's"

Aubergine Parkinson says: "*clears her throat suggestively*"

Avren says: "*glancing over at Auby and shrugging* Hey, you don't need introductions, your reputation precedes you. Also, it's on the van."

Valor says: "Well*He pauses for a few seconds*I know who she is now. "

Aubergine Parkinson says: "*rolls her troubled eyes with sparks of crazy, whining* All do is fake swoon, slam window, shoot crossbow. Hrrrr. *teeth grinding like gears, industrious beating of jaws* Nobody buy my magic. Ey! Fishman. Valerie. *scowls at him something fierce* Why you buy none? You poor? *eyes commanding a driver's attention* Ey! We leave."

Avren says: "*patiently* We're waiting on Slayde. We'll leave as soon as he wakes up."
Avren says: "He knew we'd be out here today or tomorrow, he should be up soon."

Valor says: "Well, I don't really believe in magic. I also see know reason in wearing jewelry.*He slightly smiles*"

Lion says: "Got two rings, Valor. One of searching, one of seeking. They help me find things, just rarely the things I'm looking for."

Valor says: "That is nice, but I just don't believe in it. Sorry."

Aubergine Parkinson says: "Why you got two shields? *holds out a grubby hand, leaning out the window* Gimme, ain't gotta shield cause I gave mine to Adilah."

Lion says: "Neither. But it's comforting against the things I know, absolutely know, and can't perceive."

Aubergine Parkinson drops a brand new iron shield.

-----


from radio at freq. 100: "This is Olivia in Olipifirovash for Lion and Avren. You'll be happy to know Shaudawn is back safe and sound. Also there was a Stone Knight here. I'm letting you know he did what he was supposed to do."

Aubergine Parkinson says: "*speaking with the disappointment of one who's just missed an Interesting Event* Ey, now we ain't see it 'cause boy need a motorcycle! Ugh! Why don't he drive van? *kicks the radio, kicks the seat, kicks the nearest feet; various acts of vandalism* He ain't gimme nothin."
Aubergine Parkinson stores some window glass in tuned car engine B (petrol).

Lion says: "That's good to hear about Shazzy. And Blahblah."
Lion says: "Add it to my tab, Aubergine, if there's a payment that's needed."

We arrived at the middle of nowhere.

Aubergine Parkinson leaves Aubergine P. the Fortune Teller, entering forest.
Lion leaves Aubergine P. the Fortune Teller, entering forest.
Slayde says: "*He chuckles lighlty* Here..."
Slayde gives some grain spirit to Aubergine Parkinson.
Slayde says: "That's about all I even have on me. And it's all the booze I got. Sorry for messing up your entertainment. "

Slayde says: "And if I had a van Aubergine, believe me I'd be driving it. Where are we now?"

Lion expertly kills a dire wolf using a new claymore.
Some fur is pulled to Aubergine P. the Fortune Teller, coming from the central area of Blojt Forest West.
Lion says: "*nods to the water* Thorn of the Rose. Anyone recognise the ship?"

Aubergine Parkinson points at generic old man (a man who is very old).
Aubergine Parkinson says: "Ey, why you got four cars? Need one, c'mon, just one. *throws back a shot of vodka* That one."
Aubergine Parkinson points at car.
Aubergine Parkinson says: "Give you real magic ring for it? *she tries bravely, advancing towards the man with a copper trinket* C'moooon."

Slayde says: "*He looks back at Aubergine clearly amused* Magic ring huh? What's it do? "

Lion says: "Heh. If he wakes up, it clearly raises the dead."

Aubergine Parkinson says: "*waves a cane in front of the old man's face, demanding his immediate attention* Ey. Ey. Real magic ring. Make you love come back. Real cheap, c'mon, gimme car 'cause you ain't need four. *looks at him with innocently pleading eyes, and a star is born*"

Slayde says: "Hell I wish getting a car was that easy *he chuckles* Sounds like quite a deal to me."

Aubergine Parkinson says: "Ish called art of askin'. *nods smugly at this piece of drunkard's wisdom*"

------

from radio at freq. 100: "*sound like gritty sand slips through the airwaves* Ey! Gemstone man. Wom. *snorts loudly* Give you free fortune tellin' for 20 gram sapph! Oppirash. C'mon... real Aubergine Parkinson. Special offer. *sound of chewing* Ok."

Avren says: "*fixes eyes on the transmitter and tries to circle strafe around the dwarf*"

Aubergine Parkinson says: "Shut up! Why you always ruin all. *waves the cane wildly near the transmitter* Ey!"

Avren says: "*watches her a second with a raised brow, then dodges nimbly around*"

Aubergine Parkinson says: "*stops, out of breath*"
Aubergine Parkinson points at Avren.
Aubergine Parkinson says: "*wordless cane*"

Aubergine Parkinson says into radio extended range radio transmitter at freq. 200: "*sound of a loud whack against the radio's exterior*"

Avren says: "*backs hastily away* Fine, fine. You handle the negotiations then."

Avren says: "Just get her...or him? *she frowns* What kind of name is Coral? To bring me a damned sapphire. I've only been wanting one for something like six years now, jeez."

Aubergine Parkinson says: "Yeh me thirty six."

from radio at freq. 100: "I'm sorry, I did not understand that last broadcast. I will try and visit all the towns that are asking. I might just go to the nearest town I see, so it might be Moku South that I visit first."

Aubergine Parkinson says: "*in the process of abusing the radio (in a more physical way, unfortunately, than Avren is wont to do), the cane merely a flicker, a shadow that flits through the air* HE KNOW NOTHING."

Aubergine Parkinson says: "*angrily* Don't understand... don't understand... dumb, dumb! *wooden cane licks angrily at the radio case, suffering several strokes (the kind unmatched even by seaside barons)* Stupid shipman."

Mysterious Mustachioed Man says: "Ah. I have a thought. You could send me. *twirls his mustache* They don't hate me. *pauses* I might have to let Suzie stroke my mustache, though."

Avren says: "*looks at him uncertainly* Are you sure they don't hate you? You were hanging around Olip that time, and being friendly to us, and to Trip."

Mysterious Mustachioed Man says: "I helped Fritz grind grain and Suzie kept trying to feel my mustache."

Aubergine Parkinson says: "Feel MY moustache! *lifts her skirt angrily at the radio, exceedingly angry* Try understand THAT, shipman!"
User avatar
Snowdrop
Posts: 454
Joined: Wed Jan 29, 2014 8:23 am

Re: Funny or interesting IC quotes

Postby Snowdrop » Fri Nov 13, 2015 12:52 am

iavatus wrote:Avren says: "Oh? Sorry, thought you knew. I'm Avren Banner, the, uh...what was it? *glancing questioningly at Bray* good-as-heartless witch?"

Avren points at Lion.
Avren says: "And this is Lion."
Avren says: "The wardrobe's in the back of the van."


Uh, beware the huge OOC reference... :|
User avatar
prometheus
Posts: 222
Joined: Tue Aug 11, 2015 11:16 pm

Re: Funny or interesting IC quotes

Postby prometheus » Fri Nov 13, 2015 1:43 am

Why beware??
User avatar
*Wiro
Posts: 5850
Joined: Mon Sep 29, 2008 1:24 pm

Re: Funny or interesting IC quotes

Postby *Wiro » Fri Nov 13, 2015 2:09 am

That joke has been around since they were like 21. I don't recall who first said it, but it was someone in San D'Oria.
Retired player. Feel free to message me. Be well.

Read about my characters by following this link.
User avatar
computaertist
Posts: 660
Joined: Sun Dec 30, 2012 3:33 am

Re: Funny or interesting IC quotes

Postby computaertist » Fri Nov 13, 2015 2:54 am

Snowdrop wrote:
iavatus wrote:Avren says: "Oh? Sorry, thought you knew. I'm Avren Banner, the, uh...what was it? *glancing questioningly at Bray* good-as-heartless witch?"

Avren points at Lion.
Avren says: "And this is Lion."
Avren says: "The wardrobe's in the back of the van."


Uh, beware the huge OOC reference... :|

:?:
...
:|
...
:o
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
I LOVE IT!
Mark Twain wrote:Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.
User avatar
Marian
Posts: 3190
Joined: Thu Dec 15, 2005 12:16 am

Re: Funny or interesting IC quotes

Postby Marian » Mon Dec 14, 2015 4:13 am

Wow, has this thread been sitting untouched for a month?

Well here, courtesy of Anony:


4908-2.22: Alice says: "*she stares at the girls in dreads* Hi Hi! I'm Alice! You're pretty! Do you like music?"

4908-2.22: Inithia says: "*she sniffs imperiously at the other woman* I do not have any interest in music. "

4908-2.22: Alice says: "It must suck to be so boring. *she sticks her tongue out*"

4908-2.22: Inithia says: "*turns her back* Yes I imagine so, but I have no interest in learning about your lifestyle. "

4908-2.22: Alice says: "I wasn't asking you to."

4908-2.22: Inithia says: "*her face turns sour* Although my life /has/ been empty or purpose of late. My dress is still white. "

4908-2.24: Alice says: "*giggles cutely*"

4908-2.28: Alice says to Dorice: "Dorice! You awake?"

4908-2.29: Dorice says: "FUCK YEAH I'M AWAKE!"

4908-2.29: You hear Dorice play some music on a brand new electric guitar.

4908-2.29: Dorice says: "*she rips her fingers across the strings, causing an explosive outburst of ragged, distorted notes to echo across the harbor*"

4908-2.29: Dorice says: "Hello, peoples! I'm Dorice, lead singer of the ICE SISTERS, the coolest, hippest, and LOUDEST band in the world!"

4908-2.29: Dorice says: "I'M NOT SUPER GOOD AT MODERATING MY VOLUME BUT MOST PEOPLE DON'T COMPLAIN!"

4908-2.30: Girl says: "*She claps.* Woo!"

4908-2.32: Girl says: "HI DORICE.."

4908-4.01: Inithia says: "Let me in. "

4908-4.02: Olivia says: "*she stops checking her ropes on the ship and turns toward Inithia* I'm sorry what did you say? "

4908-4.04: Inithia says: "*crosses her arms* Let me in. "

4908-4.04: Olivia says: "*she starts to climb aboard her ship* Usually when someone wants something they ask nicely."

4908-4.04: Alice says: "*she giggles cutely*"

4908-4.05: Olivia says: "*she jumps back over the side of the ship, landing on the dock near Inithia*"

4908-4.05: Inithia says: "*rolls her eyes* Lord your authority all you want, Olivia, just let me in and I'll leave you be. "

4908-4.06: Olivia says: "*she shakes her head* That's not what I'm doing, but I refuse to be commanded, too."

4908-4.06: Olivia says: "Your arrogant butt can sit out here until you find some manners."

4908-4.07: Inithia says: "*sniffs* Fine, I'll just sit here and make this building. Maybe I'll go on at length about the revolting sex practices of Rosenbury. "

4908-4.07: Marie Alexander says: "*Her mouth drops open and she puts a hand over it just as quick, having to put her tea down and try to recover from choking.*"

4908-4.07: Olivia says: "*she shrugs* Avren isn't here to torture with it so it would be a waste of time. You could just say please open the door and it would all be over. Besides you're more likely to offend those who don't have a key than you will me."

4908-4.07: Inithia says: "You know, spawning in Rosenbury like I did, I am very grateful to be blind. *she sniffs* I doubt I'll offend anyone, as I'll be leaving once you let me out."

4908-4.08: Inithia says: "Or you could let me sit here and insult everyone in earshot. "

4908-4.08: Marie Alexander says: "Inithia, that isn't nice or called for. *She said between coughs.* "

4908-4.08: Inithia says: "Hello Marie. Good to.... See you again. "

4908-4.09: Marie Alexander says: "*Exhales slowly, regaining some composure as she wiped her mouth with a silk napkin.* Now, whatever is the matter? Right before you left there was a strained sort of grumpiness about you and now its become positively angry. Has someone done something to you in order to warrant this ?"

4908-4.08: Dorice says: "Oh, I hope she does the 'insult everyone' thing. "

4908-4.09: Alice says: "*she giggles* That'd be fun, Dorice. I agree!"

4908-4.09: Dorice says: "I love rude newspawns."

4908-4.09: Inithia says: "I'm hardly a newspawn, Dorice. I'm a priestess. And a damned good one. "

4908-4.09: Olivia says: "*she raises an eyebrow and just slowly shakes her head*"

4908-4.09: Dorice says: "A priestess? Of what? Something COOL, I hope."

4908-4.10: Inithia says: "You're distracting me, Drive. How am I supposed to insult decrepit Olivia here if I'm answering your questions? "

4908-4.10: Marie Alexander says: "*Her brows furrowed and tone becomes even softer.* Why are you insulting Olivia in the first place? She is the only one awake with the key at present, so that makes no sense for what you are trying to accomplish. Honey is sweeter than oil. And even so, its not polite to insult anyone for that matter especially someone who has done nothing wrong, please stop Inithia. *By the end her voice was almost a whisper.*"

4908-4.11: Inithia says: "Marie, I think you are mistaken. Olivia is a self-righteous bitch and always has been, key or no. "

4908-4.11: Alice says to Dorice: "But yeah, what kinda priestess did she say she was?"

4908-4.11: Dorice says: "She didn't. I'm not sure she is one."

4908-4.11: Inithia says: "I'm a priestess of blood and death, Drive. "

4908-4.11: Dorice says: "It's the kind of thing newspawns like to say about themselves when they first show up before they steal a bike and then starve to death."

4908-4.11: Dorice says: "But hey, benefit of the doubt and all that, right?"

4908-4.12: Alice says: "*looks confused* Blood Death and Driving?"

4908-4.12: Inithia says: "No, I'm speaking to Drive. "

4908-4.12: Dorice says: "I think there's someone called Drive in town."

4908-4.12: Alice says: "Who's Drive?"

4908-4.12: You see Inithia pointing at Dorice.

4908-4.12: Inithia says: "That one. Drive is her name. I cannot drive, I'm afraid. Too much mayhem. "

4908-4.12: Alice says: "No. That's Dorice."

4908-4.12: Inithia says: "Yes, that is what I said. Drive. "

4908-4.12: Inithia says: "Drive and Alive. "

4908-4.12: Dorice says: "*she winces* I think she's also a bit deaf, Alice."

4908-4.12: Dorice says: "No wonder she doesn't care for music."

4908-4.12: Marie Alexander says: "*Her glasses slid towards the tip of her nose and she looked over them at Inithia, taken aback momentarily but she quickly recovers.Her tone keeps an even and soft cadence, never raising to a yell.* I suggest keeping one's words soft and sweet for you may have to eat them. Swearing is not only unladylike it is very rude, and calling someone out of their name with such a term is equally unsettling. I have not known Olivia to be anything but fair and key or no she is still to be respected. Why are you saying such horrible things? I never knew you to be that way. "

4908-4.12: Inithia says: "You never knew me much at all, Marie. "

4908-4.12: Alice says: "Yeah, poor girl. *she shakes her head solemnly then takes another large bite out of the raw chunk of meat in her hands*"

4908-4.12: Dorice says: "You shouldn't eat that raw, Alice, you're going to get sick."

4908-4.12: Alice says: "Perhaps, but this way all the raw power wont be cooked out."

4908-4.12: Dorice says to you: "That newspawn is a bitch. I mean, a lot of newspawns are, but she's like a superbitch."

4908-4.12: Alice says: "'Sides I'm not good at cooking."

4908-4.12: Dorice says: "Well *I* am."

4908-4.12: Marie Alexander says: "I like to believe there is good, and kindness in everyone. "

4908-4.12: Olivia says: "*she nods and smiles to Marie* I thank you. We all have our unpleasant moments, but I've never been self-righteous. "

4908-4.12: Inithia says: "If the idiotic /edit/ *she hits the t hard* can't look past the end of her own tits to see letting me out is the better solution for her,i won't spell it out. "

4908-4.13: Inithia says: "She's the one keeping me here, to insult her. *snorts at Olivia* You did just feel the need to come out here and wiggle your big authority cocktail at me, didn't you? Not even doing anything on your boat, just standing there, I can hear you. "

4908-4.13: Inithia says: "But by all means, feed on the go trip of people defending you, Olivia. I'm sure I makes you wet. "

4908-4.13: Inithia says: "If anything still can. "

4908-4.13: Marie Alexander says: "*Shakes her head, unruffled by the words it seems, and her words remain gentle.* Calling Olivia out of her name will not solve anything. She has the choice to leave you our there all year if she pleases, and she just might do so. An apology might help at this point, but there can be no promises on that matter, as I do not know how forgiving Olivia will be after such an unfortunate display. Everyone can get snarky here and there but ..enough is enough Inithia, its time to stop. "

4908-4.13: Inithia says: "I will not apologize to her or anyone, Marie, and you can't make me. No one can make me do anything. "

4908-4.13: Inithia says: "All I want is to leave, but no. Spite and kowtowiing you demand. "

4908-4.13: Marie Alexander says: "I never said that I could make you, only you can do that. It is a strong advisory, and a wise one. I haven't demanded anything of you, and nor has Olivia except to be polite. Is that too much to ask?"

4908-4.13: Olivia says: "*she shakes her head slowly and continues to repair the armful of tools she retrieved from the ship*"

4908-4.14: Olivia says: "Has anybody ever read the laws of Olipifirovash to you, Inithia?"

4908-4.15: Olivia says: "*she sets her repairs aside and begins to bury the man*"

4908-4.16: Inithia says: "Let me guess. The laws read "you must be polite and Olivia is God. Suckle at her aged teat" "

4908-4.16: Marie Alexander says: "*Shakes her head.* I see there is little use in advising you to at least be civil."

4908-4.17: Alice says: "Oh you're funny, Miss Dreads."

4908-4.17: Inithia says: "My name is Inithia, Alive. "

4908-4.17: Dorice says: "Inithia Alive is a pretty cool name."

4908-4.17: Dorice says: "Has like, a poetry to it."

4908-4.17: Dorice says: "*she roars in a voice like a raging gale* AGED TEATS OF ANCIENT edit, REGAL RULING ARTIFACTS, HOLDING KEYS AND GUARDING DOORS, BEG FOR FAVOR ON ALL FOURS! "

4908-4.17: Dorice plays some music on a brand new electric guitar.

4908-4.18: Dorice says: "*she plays a screeching melody, like a dying beast*"

4908-4.18: Alice says: "*hammers out a wild rhythm like stamping of a enraged elephant*"

4908-4.18: Alice plays some music on a brand new jembe drum.

4908-4.18: Alice plays some music on a brand new small drum.

4908-4.18: Dorice says: "PRIESTESS OF SCORN, BLINDED AND BORN, CURSED TO EVER CURSE, FOREVER FORLORN! SEPULCHER OF FORGOTTEN MEN, BUILD A GRAVE TO HOUSE THEM IN, BURN THE BLOODY OFFERING, SCREAM WORDS OF YOUR OBEDIIIIIEEEEEEENNNNNCE!"

4908-4.18: Dorice plays some music on a brand new electric guitar.

4908-4.18: Alice says: "*she screeches high-pitched and blood curdlingly* THE DEFIANT CHILD CLAWS THE DOOR! PRIESTESS OF DISAPPOINTMENT!"

4908-4.19: Dorice plays some music on a brand new electric guitar.

4908-4.19: Dorice says: "*her melody rages across the harbor, an electric wail*"

4908-4.19: Alice says: "*she picks up the pace of her drums and then abruptly stops with a massive thump sending waves of pressure through the air and rocking all the boats*"

4908-4.19: Alice plays some music on a brand new small drum.

4908-4.19: Inithia says: "*wincing, yelling to be heard over the din* MY NAME IS MADAME INITHIA DE ODUYA, SHE WHO HEARS THE GOD'S. "

4908-4.19: Dorice says: "*she cuts off her melody equally abruptly, and high-fives Alice* That was SIIIIICK."

4908-4.19: Alice says: "*reciprocates the high-five* I knoooow riiiiiight!"

4908-4.19: Alice says: "*she looks to Inithia* What Gods?"

4908-4.20: Alice says: "*she scratches her head*"

4908-4.20: Dorice says: "Yeah I thought she was a preistess of Death, Blood,
and Driving. Those aren't gods though."

4908-4.20: Alice says: "I mean I get the Blood and Death and Driving thing. It's totally righteous, but what is she going on about?"

4908-4.20: Olivia says: "*she looks over her shoulder toward the harbor at they yelling* Then shouldn't you be praying for the soul I'm burying since Shaudawn is asleep?"

4908-4.20: Inithia says: "*her face twists* Why on earth would I do that? They are dead and their soul was not used in sacrifice so they are gone. Completely. "

4908-4.20: Dorice says: "I dunno, we're only hearing one side of the conversation here. "

4908-4.20: Inithia says: "I am a conduit between the gods of blood and death and chaos, ladies. A priestess for them. "

4908-4.20: Alice says: "Chaos is a funny synonym for driving."

4908-4.20: Dorice says: "Not if you're blind, Alice."

4908-4.20: Dorice says: "Then all driving is chaos."

4908-4.20: Alice says: "*she giggles* True true."

4908-4.20: Olivia says: "*she resumes her digging*"

4908-4.22: Inithia says: "Why do you keep talking about driving? "

4908-4.22: Dorice says: "I wanna meet the god of driving. I bet he's got the sweetest ride."

4908-4.23: Alice says: "*she nods* I bet it's a low rider with fuzzy dice and tricked out paint job!"

4908-4.23: Inithia says: "I said nothing of driving. "

4908-4.23: Alice says: "Psht... don't take it back now. *she shakes her head* Well to be honest, I bet the driving God has a MUCH cooler priestess."
User avatar
Kyriel
Posts: 389
Joined: Mon Apr 27, 2015 9:50 pm

Re: Funny or interesting IC quotes

Postby Kyriel » Wed Dec 16, 2015 4:38 am

4899-6.18: Elliryanna says: "*she rubs her eyes and looks around* Oh... Have we picked up another shipmate?"
4899-6.19: Jesp Unti says: "We have, this is Nala."
4899-6.19: Jesp Unti says: "She's trying to learn our language, and I suspect she'll be invaluable when speaking with the natives of the Seven Isles and Fu."
4899-6.19: Elliryanna says: "That'll be nice. I have to stop being so sleepy, I want to get better at her language too, don't want to be the only one who barely makes head or tails of it."
4899-6.19: Elliryanna says: "*she frowns slightly and her head tilts. She seems more thoughtful than upset* I just realized, that's kind of a strange English idiom, 'heads or tails'. Wonder where it came from."
4899-6.20: Stella says: "Perhaps it comes from coins having a 'head' and a 'tail'?"
4899-6.20: You see Stella tossing copper coin. The obverse side points up.
4899-6.20: You see Jesp Unti tossing silver coin. The obverse side points up.
4899-6.20: You see Jesp Unti pet domesticated ostrich.
4899-6.20: Elliryanna says: "Could be... *she sounds distant, the peculiarities of the English language apparently not enough to recapture her interest. She continues to stare out at the waves*"
4899-6.21: Stella says: "Let's not get caught up in our language when we have a whole new one to learn."
4899-6.21: Elliryanna says: "*shrug, not speaking, not turning around*"
4899-6.21: Jesp Unti says: "I think learning the dumb sayings we have in english will be the hardest thing for Nala to learn, since most don't actually mean anything."
4899-6.21: Kyriel says: "Yeah, don't cry over spilled milk."
4899-6.22: Jesp Unti says: "I got an ace in the hole, Kyriel."
4899-6.22: Howard Cromley says: "When we were in town, they said I had a blue tongue. I think it's their way of saying 'bad at speaking Polish'."
4899-6.22: Stella says: "Pisze o podróz."
4899-6.22: You see Stella point at envelope "Seahawk Expedition" held by Stella.
4899-6.22: Jesp Unti says: "Maybe if you stopped getting away by the skin of your teeth, your tongue wouldn't be so discoloured, Howie."
4899-6.22: Howard Cromley says: "I'm sure both languages are filled with bizarre idioms."
4899-6.22: Kyriel says: "You weren't running a blue streak, were you?"
4899-6.23: Howard Cromley says: "I don't even know what that means."
4899-6.23: Kyriel says: "I guess that one came a bit out of the blue. Better get my head out of the clouds."
4899-6.23: Elliryanna says: "Wait. *finally, she has been pulled out of her blue funk*"
4899-6.23: Howard Cromley says: "Looks like the clouds came to us."
4899-6.23: Elliryanna says: "*she turns around* Having a blue tongue means being bad at Polish? I should write that down, that's interesting."
4899-6.23: Howard Cromley says: "Like being green around the gills, maybe."
4899-6.23: Stella says: "*She looks at the fog* I know you were under a cloud, Elliryanna, but that's going a bit too far."
4899-6.23: Jesp Unti says: "My eyes are misting up just thinking about it."
4899-6.24: Stella says: "Let's hope it has a silver lining."
4899-6.24: Elliryanna says: "...I'm not sure whether to consider this a pun war or an idiom battle."
4899-6.24: Howard Cromley says: "I always thought my tongue was more silver, personally."
4899-6.24: Kyriel says: "But did you spawn with a silver spoon in your mouth?"
4899-6.24: Jesp Unti says: "I always had the golden touch, myself."
4899-6.25: Kyriel says: "That one's gold."
4899-6.25: Jesp Unti says: "This would have been the golden opportunity for an idiom about being the Klojt golden boy, Kyriel, but you missed the boat."
4899-6.25: Stella says: "Yes, that ship has sailed."
4899-6.25: Howard Cromley says: "You're being left in the wake."
4899-6.25: Jesp Unti says: "Ya took the wind outta my sails."
4899-6.26: Elliryanna says: "Poor Nala's not going to understand any of this."
User avatar
Marian
Posts: 3190
Joined: Thu Dec 15, 2005 12:16 am

Re: Funny or interesting IC quotes

Postby Marian » Wed Dec 16, 2015 5:20 am

Make them stop! :lol:

Not as bad as a pun-off, but getting there...
User avatar
destinysWalrus
Posts: 239
Joined: Wed Oct 23, 2013 12:03 am
Location: Southern California

Re: Funny or interesting IC quotes

Postby destinysWalrus » Wed Dec 16, 2015 5:45 am

Oh yes, I remember that. It was entertaining. But then I have a weakness for terrible puns and especially peculiar idioms.
User avatar
SekoETC
Posts: 15501
Joined: Wed May 05, 2004 11:07 am
Location: Finland
Contact:

Re: Funny or interesting IC quotes

Postby SekoETC » Tue Jan 12, 2016 9:48 pm

Raker named: 200 gram szpinaku, widły i martwe kakadu

Made me laugh.
Not-so-sad panda

Return to “General Discussion”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests